DD lost her dance enthusiasm :(

[Shellym]

My DD (10)has been in tears last tonight, she’s scared she doesn’t feel the buzz she used to with ballet.  Just before lockdown she was in her dance schools big show, she performed her heart out and was on a real high.  The day after the dance school closed due to government advice so there was no after show congratulations at the dance school etc.  The teacher did this on line but not quite the same.  She has been doing class zoom lessons with the dance school and   She starts her first associates class with Graham Fletcher Ballet Associates on zoom.  Not ideal being her first lesson.  I’m trying to keep her motivated but I’m not a dancer so I have no idea what she’s feeling.  Anybody else’s DD or DS having the same feelings? Thank you xx

[Fiz]

I think everyone is feeling flat and rather overwhelmed and she probably is too. 

[NJH]

post show 'drop' - especially without the usual decompression   plus lock down   = this is normal  reaction to the situation 

[glowlight]

I think most people aren't feeling the usual buzz about doing the things they usually do, so please encourage her that what she is feeling is quite normal.  

 

Perhaps she needs to take a little step back and rest for a few weeks.  

 

Trust that the buzz will come back.  It probably will, with a vengeance.  

 

(But if it doesn't it isn't the end of the world...no need to tell her that now).

 

 

[Mrs Brown]

my daughter is struggling too. she turned 11 this week. She is all over the place. has she finished primary school or not, is she going to get transfer day for secondary school or not. all her competitions and festivals have been cancelled. she was excited about exams due to be taken in the summer but those won't be happening. She was halfway through learning one new dance and had just finished learning one but now they will have to change before she gets to compete them as the length will be wrong by the autumn. She had other dances she was going to do for the last time this term, tutu only just fits and she was going to squeeze into it but now won't have the chance, dance school show cancelled etc.

 

To her her little world is just not as she knows it. She won't do online lessons, won't really practice and feels things are a bit pointless. Your daughter isn't alone.

 

I wish I could suggest something but I haven't got anywhere yet. Feel free to message me directly if you want to. 

 

[Pups_mum]

I agree with everyone else. It is a normal reaction to the circumstances and probably doesn't really mean she has lost her love for dance.

I think that most youngsters are getting fed up of the situation. At first I think there was a degree of almost excitement for "online everything" and being off school. But as time has gone on the enormity of the situation has hit home to those who are old enough to understand and the frustration has intensified for those who aren't. I overheard my 16 year old talking to one of his friends on the phone the other night, saying that he really wished they could get back to school, and he is missing the teachers, which is something I never thought I would hear. The novelty of the lockdown is definitely wearing off for people of all ages and all interests.

I would let your DD have a break if she wants. The Associates might actually give her a bit of a boost, but if she doesn't want to be doing loads of online classes or whatever then I wouldn't push the issue. Everyone is going to take time to adjust when normal classes return - she isn't going to get left behind or anything, and at that age she will probably bounce right back when she gets going again. 

[Bluebird22]

I am running online classes for my students and this week has been the hardest, all the kids seem really deflated and miserable, the novelty of taking class online has worn off, this isn’t just an extended Easter break. I’ve returned to ballet classes myself whilst we have been in lockdown and taking class online is really hard. Having been both the teacher and student it’s completely draining from both angles. I’ve sent the kids lots of performances to watch for when they don’t feel like taking class. And in a bid to cheer them up I’m planning a quiz night via zoom, using the break out “rooms” so they can play in teams. None of us know how to weather this storm but I think it’s so important that the kids know that whatever they feel it’s ok. It is really hard to feel a buzz about dancing when so much of dancing relies on performance and expression be that to an audience or your teachers and peers. Trying to perform

and express yourself when you are worried your penche line might hit a lamp is incredibly difficult. Maybe suggest they recreate their performance, create a stage at home or in the garden, put on stage make up and costumes and perform to the house and any family members you can invite online. One of my online classes were set a challenge of making their own costume from whatever they could find around the house and then the following week they wore them to class. 
 

Sending love to all the aspiring

dancers right now who feel a little lost xxx

[alison]

1 hour ago, Bluebird22 said:

I’ve sent the kids lots of performances to watch for when they don’t feel like taking class.

 

That's a point.  We've commented here previously on how it seems that relatively few young dance students actually watch much of the dance they are training for.  Perhaps it could inspire them.  And there is the dance streaming calendar down the right-hand side of the forum page, if that's of any use to you.

[Shellym]

Thank you so much for your replies, she had a good lesson today, cane out with some of her usual buzz.  I’ve told her lots of people feel the same.  Xx

[drdance]

Students and teachers are feeling it too! I'm pretty disheartened by it all and it takes vast amounts of energy to teach online classes. I started back last week and my experience was mixed and I was left feeling tired and emotional. After getting feedback from parents, I'm trying a new timetable this week and I'll see how it goes. I just can't wait to be back doing actual, real, face to face classes. The world is an overwhelming place right now and we just have to go with it. Some days will feel awful, and the only way to get through them is making sure our basic needs are met (nutrition, safety, love). Other days might feel less scary and it's only then that we can do things above and beyond our basic needs (hobbies, work, chores, learning etc). 

[Tango Dancer]

I think everyone is feeling flat at the moment.  I don't always feel the urge to dance that I did when classes were happening in person.  Usually when I am dancing I am glad I made myself do it.  

 

I think it's entirely normal for your daughter to feel disheartened and less interested.  Everything can feel so overwhelming so I think all we can do is take it one day at a time.  

 

I have so much respect for the teachers like @drdance trying to teach a class electronically.  I can see how hard it must be getting a class right online when you can't correct people as well and aren't getting the same feedback.  I can only say that as an amateur ballet dancer my ballet classes 2-3 times per week are one of the high points of the week and I really appreciate my teachers for the efforts they make to adapt their class to teach in smaller more confined spaces.  It feels so lovely coming away from work, getting my ballet costume on and forgetting about everything for an hour.  

[glowlight]

I want to share some words form an article that the head of our local primary school posted, in response to many approaches from concerned parents about the mental health of their children at this time...

 

'This experience is affecting children from all backgrounds, all ages and all abilities. There is no pattern for which children are most affected. 
It is our duty to ensure our children return to school and are strong and can persevere BEFORE we start addressing any gaps in learning.'

 

 

 

 

[Peony]

ballet really needs a good floor and lots of space. As much as I try and enthuse about home classes it’s just not that great on your own clinging onto a chair at hip height and trying to make you feet move on carpet! My kids have got even less enthusiasm for taking online class than me which makes me sad but it’s bad enough overseeing the school work and getting them to tidy up occasionally without adding ballet to the must dos🤣 I’m leaving them be, hopefully they’ll be back in the studio soonish!

[Dance*is*life]

This whole situation is really difficult for everyone - students and teachers alike.  I am trying really hard ro keep the interest and love for dance going and by showing I care, I have managed to turn around some kids, but we have a whole class who refuse to do anything!  They won't join zoom classes and when I was trying to do projects on WhatsApp they refused to join those as well.  The only thing they did enjoy doing was a continuous dance.  I choose the music and each girl choreographs and dances a 15 second piece and passes it on to the next student who starts in the pose where the previous one finished.  The results have been lovely and a great reminder of the Corona lockdown.

 

Zoom ballet classes are really frustrating.  The lack of space, an unstable "barre" , hard slippery floor (our floors are all tiled) plus the fact that they all hear the music at a different time according to their internet speed combine together to make it rather unsatisfactory for all concerned.  It takes  lot of commitment to continue trying and I think it's just been going on too long.  Now I am finding that whenever I want to fix a zoom class with the students the bulk of them are so inundated with school lessons into the evening that they just can't fit my classes in to their schedule even with the best will in the world.  However, the parents have told me that my contact with the students has made all the difference. It grounds them and gives them the connection with the world they love so much.  So I keep on trying.

 

I wouldn't worry too much if they lose their enthusiasm, as long as they're not actually depressed.  Parents can really boost their morale by helping them find a suitable space for the zoom classes - even if it means vacating the living room for them.   It's so difficult for them to do anything when they're stuck in a small bedroom between the bed and the wardrobe!  Anyway, let's  hope that it won't  be long before we're able to get back to our studios............  The most important thing is that we all stay safe and well.  

Edited May 5, 2020 by Dance*is*life

[Motomum]

My son Y7 is seriously thinking about not returning to his Associate program and stopping ballet.

He has a Y8 offer from Elmhurst but doesn’t want to go now either.

 

He is aware he is lacking motivation to train and exercise as he was before the lockdown.

 

i am being very mindful just to validate how he feels and that if he still feels like this come September (as this is when his classes will resume again) then he can of course stop. He is anxious about the virus too, I am vulnerable and this scares him a lot.

 

I don’t want him to stop, but it’s not my choice. My main focus is his day to day happiness and emotional well-being.

He knows we are in extraordinary times, but he’s a child and doesn’t fully understand how this will impact on him emotionally and skew his immediate thoughts about his world.

 

Zoom and virtual classes are amazing, but they are of course a strangely sterile environment for the creative process. 

 

In the meantime his focus is on cleaning his bike (which has been much neglected in the last two years) for a bike ride with me this afternoon. And choosing a new swimming pool is also a priority. 😁

Ballet as he knew it is on hold for now as it isn’t making him feel good atm. 

I never thought that would be a sentence I would ever write or think.

[meadowblythe]

Hugs to you both.

 

If he was anything like my son, a good burst of exercise (now the bike is clean, get it dirty again!) helps a lot.

 

He is obviously very talented, I am sure other opportunities will arise if he decides that now is not the time.

 

Feel free to PM

Meadowblythe

[Mrs Brown]

Motomum that is a shame but you are right, all you can do is let him work through it himself in his own time and let him know you are there to listen.  It is scary for them, pushing their much loved activity away is how some of them will protect themselves from it not being possible in the future for whatever reason. If they can't go back to lessons, or in his case start at vocational school, in the autumn then he probably thinks it will be easier to deal with if he can convince himself he didn't want to anyway.