glowlight

How's everyone doing? Just returned from my short break away in North Yorkshire. It was lovely to have a few days away from home and to get out walking in different surroundings. I am now bold enough to go inside a café for lunch. Still not quite ready for pubs! And decided not to bother with the few tourist attractions in the area (I've visited most of them before and they'll still be there next time). I'm just so glad I enjoy walking otherwise life would be really miserable! It was great to be away, but great to be home too.

I think @Spamcathas judged this well - PLEASE don't read too much into when your videos were viewed and for how long. If the judges are viewing them from home in their own time there will be no rhyme or reason to it. I know this is really difficult but try not to read too much into what has been viewed and when. (PS - I'm so glad that we didn't have videos auditions when my dd was doing this - it must be so much harder for you guys now!)

Lol - nothing like - but I have been around the block a bit! But thank you.

Thankyou @Tulip. Some of the language in this thread was starting to make me feel uncomfortable. Just as we shouldn't generalise about dancers who don't fit the 'classic' ballet aesthetic, it is just as harmful to generalise about those who do. This too is body shaming. Slim dancers (I don't want to use the term 'skinny' as I wouldn't use the term 'fat' to describe a larger dancer) may be slim for many reasons - some may be to do with over dieting, but some people are genetically made that way. And they still have to be talented and dedicated to get a place at vocational school and to succeed in their careers.

A couple more thoughts from me: It might help to schedule specific time for homework every day. eg if homework is supposed to take 20 minutes - maybe schedule a half hour for it each evening with no TV, no phones, and if it isn't completed in that time draw a line under it. Explain to the school you are taking this approach as it may take a few weeks to settle into it and there will be some days when homework doesn't get completed. If possible make a special place for her to sit and do her homework. This could be a desk in her bedroom, but it's OK if it;s the kitchen table if other distractions are removed. It just helps with routine if you always do your homework in the same place. When you speak to the head teacher, I suggest you don't describe dance as a 'hobby' - describe it as training for a future career. If your dd has other hobbies which aren't supportive of her end goal of being a dancer - maybe now is the time to consider if some of these should fall by the wayside. For many dedicated young people there comes a time when they have to chose between say dancing and athletics/music and scouts. Whilst it is great to keep some diversity, there often isn't time to fit everything once they are at secondary school.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-54553828 I expect young Desiré never expected to achieve such international fame. Let's hope the exposure brings some unexpected success for her

It is possible that the teacher simply doesn't understand how serious she is about it and the amount of training involved The way I approached it was to book an appointment with her head of year. I explained that she had a serious vocational ambition and explained the amount of training she was doing outside school. I drew up a little timetable showing her dance classes and travel time. Once the head of year understood this, she actually came up with options herself, potentially dropping a subject, and having some days not in school for a full day. She said they had recently had an aspiring footballer come through, and I think for him they arranged for him only to be in school 3 days a week. In the end we didn't take up any of these options. It seemed to be enough that once the staff knew what outside commitments she had, and why, they took the pressure off a little. So if you are not getting the answer you want - go higher up the management tree. Explain that your dd will be competing with students at vocational school who are training for several hours every day, so it is important that she can keep up her level of training ahead of her auditions. If your dd is taking much longer to do her homework than they expect it is worth asking for additional support from the school on this front. We all help our kids with homework sometimes but it shouldn't be the norm all the time. If it is they are not really getting the benefit from it.

Good point Janet - it is advisory.

These are the links to the Government Guidelines for Tier 2 and Tier 3 which gives a lot more detail than on the news websites. My interpretation is that associate classes can still run in all Tiers as long as there is no household mixing (whether you consider them education or exercise class) In terms of travel restrictions: If you live in a Tier 1/2 area and/or your class is either in the same area or another Tier 1 or Tier 2 area it looks OK to me - there are no travel restrictions for Tier 2 If you live in a Tier 3 area and your class is in the same Tier 3 area - again I think you are OK. If you live in a Tier 3 area and your class is in another area OR if you live in a non Tier 3 area and your class is in a Tier 3 area - I think the principle is that you shouldn't travel. You maybe could argue that associates are education in which case there is an exemption. But remember the areas in Tier 3 have very high infection rates. Is it the right thing to do to risk spreading it to other areas?

Frustrating for you - but as you say - maybe it is meant to be. Your dd must be very talented to have been chosen by Elmhurst. At least you do not have to make a difficult decision of having to chose between the two!

And those where it isn't obvious which way is on and which way is off.

Whilst I found the 'Fatima' ad deeply disturbing on many levels, I do think we should try to get across to our young dancers that if and when they decide that they no longer want to continue down the dancing route, there are many options open to them. When my dd was training many people asked about her 'Plan B' - would she become a teacher, or a physiotherapist. They presumed Plan B would be something dance related - but it doesn't have to be. My dd's second career, after she finished working on Cruise Ships, has been as a Web Developer. Admittedly she was lucky to find a company happy to take on someone with no experience and train them. She is also lucky that it was her choice when to stop dancing professionally. I appreciate there are many currently who will not have that luxury.

I would say let her audition (if you can afford to). There is no way to second guess what they are looking for, but if she doesn't try there will always be a 'what if' in future. Treat the audition as a fun day out, an experience in its own right. If she gets shortlisted it's an added bonus.

I have a friend who works in cybersecurity who is wondering whether it is too late for him to retrain as a dancer!!

Here is a link to the BBC's article about this ad, which says that it is from an old campaign which has been recently resurrected. https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-54505841 I just love the quote from shadow mental health minister Dr Rosena Allin-Khan "Fatima, you be you. Don't let anyone else tell you that you aren't good enough because you don't conform to their preconceived social norms."

Agree totally

I think that given this is a business arrangement (ie the teacher is doing this as part of their job) it would not contravene COVID regulations - as long as social distancing could be maintained within the dance shop.

I've been caught out a couple of times. Now I check the thresholds before I order something from overseas. Sometimes it's cheaper to break an order into separate orders if you are ordering several items to keep it below the thresholds.

This webpage gives details of how the charges work https://www.gov.uk/goods-sent-from-abroad/tax-and-duty Basically you have to pay VAT on goods over £15 + Customs duty on goods over £135 (the rate depends on where they come from). And of course whether you get charged depends on what the sender puts on the customs declaration. I think there is also a post office admin fee of £8.

Thankyou - since I posted earlier another moderator has been added which will take the pressure off my friend. It is a FB group and there does seem that things escalate very quickly from intelligent debate to people getting upset and hurt! I will suggest to her that they add more to spread the load more. They are also looking at whether their 'rules' cover everything they need to. This re-iterates to me how good this forum is and what a good job our moderators do.

mmm...I think my friend is the only moderator in her group. That might be part of the problem. It all falls to her and I think she takes it quite personally when things start to go off the rails!

Question for the moderators - did you guys have any training to learn how to be moderators? You all seem to do your job in such a balanced and fair way, even when the message is tough. I'm watching a friend who is moderating another forum, and she seems to be struggling. I'm wondering if there are any resources you can recommend which might help her.

Yes Limited Companies were able to furlough their staff, but the difficulty came for people who run one man/woman band businesses set up as limited companies of which they are a director. Technically the rules allowed for directors to be furloughed - but in this circumstance they weren't allowed to do any work for the business over and above their statutory obligations as a director, which made it very difficult for directors to take advantage of the furlough scheme and still keep their business running. Also many people in this circumstance pay themselves a minimal wage (taking money out of the business as dividends when they make a profit) and furlough entitlement was based on wage not dividend.

@Crystaltips - congratulations to your dd on gaining her degree. And to all the other graduates from BW too. I wish them all the best in their future careers.

Quite tall for a ballet company - but most companies put height ranges in their call-outs because they need company members to fit in with the general look of the company at the time. I guess it saves you the time of auditioning if you didn't stand a chance. There are many companies which look for shorter dancers so it's swings and roundabouts.