Anna C Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 Ah yes, aileen - Instagram and Snapchat? Both are very popular with my older nieces. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Legseleven Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 This is such a hot potato of a subject and each family will weigh the advantages and disadvantages and reach a different decision based on what they consider best for their circumstances. I told DD (she has always been mature and level-headed) that even if she begged - which to be fair she didn't - she would not be opening her own FB account before she was 13. Not only is that FB's requirement but my personal opinion (and I said that that would differ from other people's equally valid opinions) is that under 13 is far too young to understand the possible pitfalls and that usually kids don't 'need' their own FB account anyway ( I do understand that DCs away at vocational school might find FB a useful way of keeping up with family and friends, etc). This opinion was backed up by friends worrying that their DS was upset by comments he received when he 'liked for a rate' and saying that this was bullying - which it was, but as he was 10 or 11 at the time it was unsurprising that he found receiving low 'ratings' upsetting. DD's comment that lots of her friends had their own accounts from being under 10 in some cases was answered by my explaining that they must therefore have lied about their DOB and that I was not prepared to sanction her doing likewise as I did not feel it was appropriate to teach her that she doesn't have to follow rules if she chooses not to do so - and more to the point that lying about her age could expose her to all manner of things she was not mature enough to handle. Fortunately she then attended a talk by some very clued up young people (as opposed to her parents - always more easily accepted!) who explained exactly why FB should be treated with care and any thoughts of opening an account when she turned 13 went completely out of the window! She and her friends were also strongly warned about Snapchat although they were told that using Instagram as a private user was relatively 'safe'. DD says that a lot of her friends are moving away from FB in any event, in favour of Instagram. At least one of her friends has a separate private Instagram account in which she only posts photos of herself dancing so that this is different from her more general account. - However, I agree that it is lovely to be able to follow the journeys of DCs who have FB pages so I do see the advantages! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aileen Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 Snapchat, yes that's the one. My daughter (13) has not yet shown an interest in it but plenty of her peers are on it. I'm not keen on it as it's just posting photographs and it seems to bring out the worst in other girls. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anna C Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 Snapchat, yes that's the one. My daughter (13) has not yet shown an interest in it but plenty of her peers are on it. I'm not keen on it as it's just posting photographs and it seems to bring out the worst in other girls. Mmm, nor am I. Fortunately dd barely has time to use Facebook, let alone Instagram or Snapchat. Both would be strongly discouraged chez Spanner. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie4dancin Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 Her page is lovely Kat09 I too have a Facebook page, called Tinydancer, feel free to 'like' mine too x Both myself and my dd like your page a while ago swanprincess 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsapassion Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 My thoughts are the same ..is it the adult promoting the child to see if anyone notices them?... anyone can look and see where your child is heading that day and look at pictures... I also worry that the children who follow the ones doing so well can get upset if they have knock backs ..I know a young girl who became quite poorly with all the competition of photos etc on these sites .... I personally have no interest to be looking at teenagers I don't know photos etc ..that would just be wrong.... but we all have our own views.... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guesty Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 You can make a facebook page that is only available to members of the group that have to be invited into it by the owner of the page. But facebook still ultimately owns all the content you put on there. Social media is great in some aspects but not so in others! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anna C Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 You can make a facebook page that is only available to members of the group that have to be invited into it by the owner of the page. But facebook still ultimately owns all the content you put on there. Social media is great in some aspects but not so in others! As far as I know, that would be a Facebook Group - you can create either an open group (anyone can join), a closed group (apply to join and you must be approved by the group's Admin(s), or a secret group (nobody can see it except members approved by the Admin). I've run two FB pages and a group for organisations and while you can restrict your *page* audience by age and country, if you only want invited and approved people to join, you'd need to set up a closed or secret *group*. Complicated! :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katymac Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 DD's page was set up as an easy way to let friends and family know what is going on in her very busy life. Before I set it up I spent ages emailing replies to relatives who 'just wanted to know what was going on' Now I do that half a dozen times a month & add bits on to her page (or she does). It's much easier for me! DD is the joint administrator and adds or edits as necessary. She also often comments on my posts on here (& the other sites I go on) which she reads and sometimes agrees with & sometimes disagrees with. Maybe I am short sighted but if your child 'knows' the rules (whatever the rules for your family are) then someone knowing where they are won't affect them. Most children are targeted by someone they know closely - normally a member of their family & tbh the sort of perverts we are talking about can find pictures that will please them 'more' easily enough (horrid tho' that thought is). Facebook & other social media sites offer more threats from your child's peers than from predatory adults. Healthy and frank discussions about appropriateness of photos of sharing and 'friends' and how they interact is vital. She had a message from someone she didn't know - she brought it to my attention, I replied and they never got in touch again. If you know and trust your child and they understand the dangers - then it is a risk you may or may not take. Rather like when I put DD on the train to London by herself. It's a risk I decided to take based on my knowledge of her and the situation - so far for us both Facebook & travelling alone have been OK, but both of us are aware of the dangers and do what we can to keep safe in both places...... 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guesty Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 Sorry yes...a group page 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulieW Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 Slightly different but just wanted to say that my daughter has no problem with people seeing old photos of her in dance costumes etc, but my son asked me not to tag him when I uploaded a load of old dancing photos of him a while ago - he didn't want his colleagues seeing his old photos from when he didn't look his best! Not sure why but I respect his decision. I'm quite glad this is a new thing (social media etc) - I'd've been tempted to write a blog about our/his experiences and I don't think he'd like it now despite probably not minding at the time. I've commented a lot on this forum and the old one about our experiences over the years, but because I was fairly easily identifiable due to my username (I always felt I didn't want to hide my identity) I've always been careful not to say anything I wouldn't want out in public. I've kept any major criticisms and rather personal experiences for private conversations. 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pastel Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 I know this is a hotly debated topic. I'm not a FB lover myself. But, I have to say it was SO lovely to see Tinydancer and BalletNut's pages. Having followed your stories here it is just delightful to see your faces. Wishing you both all the best for the future. Did anyone else post the name of their dc's page? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheila Beelam Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 An ongoing debate...and with two girls 15 and 18 we've had most of the conversations above. But apparently fb is no longer cool - too many mums on it Twitter and snapchat are more of the moment, today. Personal I like fb. Handy for keeping in touch with my friends and sharing photos (my own account) Then I have a page for JB, which again is great for posting information and photos. I am no way an expert and just dabble...so unsure whether my page should have actually been set up as a group...but that's cos I'm old! It's down to individuals who know their children best to determine boundaries...but I'm sure on this forum all you'll find is a friendly word of experience from fellow parents My girls had accounts at 14 and then 13 for youngest, but I've found the youngest always seems to get things earlier! I was friends with them on fb from then, so was aware of what was posted. It's tough Being a parent! Sx 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Friends Posted March 26, 2014 Share Posted March 26, 2014 It would worry me my DD having an open FB account. I can understand sharing your journey and success with friends and family but with the WHOLE world? I do not have a FB account but easily able to find the accounts discussed above. They were interesting but what concerns me someone could easily work out where the girls would be at a weekend or time during the summer. I'm aware of my DD's safety and having such exposure could potentially lead to problems for these girls at such a young age? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anna C Posted March 26, 2014 Share Posted March 26, 2014 An ongoing debate...and with two girls 15 and 18 we've had most of the conversations above. But apparently fb is no longer cool - too many mums on it Twitter and snapchat are more of the moment, today. Personal I like fb. Handy for keeping in touch with my friends and sharing photos (my own account) Then I have a page for JB, which again is great for posting information and photos. I am no way an expert and just dabble...so unsure whether my page should have actually been set up as a group...but that's cos I'm old! It's down to individuals who know their children best to determine boundaries...but I'm sure on this forum all you'll find is a friendly word of experience from fellow parents My girls had accounts at 14 and then 13 for youngest, but I've found the youngest always seems to get things earlier! I was friends with them on fb from then, so was aware of what was posted. It's tough Being a parent! Sx No, Sheila, for a business venture/school/organisation etc. a "page" is definitely the way to go, so your Just Ballet page is great. :-) 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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