Extreme exam nerves post Covid

[mumofdd]

My 11 year old DD used to take exams every year prior to the pandemic with no issues. However, on Wednesday, she took 2 exams and was so nervous that she was shaking and kept forgetting what she was doing. She knew the grades really well, but drew a complete blank.

 

For the first exam, she was the only candidate and the examiner stopped the music and told her to start again when she messed up. She then gave her the opportunity to practice with the music while she was writing. She did this a couple of times and before my DD performed the dance. The examiner told my DD to pretend she was just in class and the examiner was her teacher, so it sounds like she could see my DD's nerves. 

 

It had been 3 years since she'd taken any exams and she was really upset. Do you think the examiner would have been making allowances, given the impact Covid has had on everyone? My DD really wanted to do her teachers proud. These were IDTA exams. 

 

On Friday, she had her Grade 3 RAD ballet exam and managed to remain in control for this one, presumably as she knew what to expect. I was proud of her for not letting her experience on Wednesday affect her performance on Friday. 

[mumofdd]

I should have added that my DD said she got the exercise right when she repeated it.

[Jan McNulty]

Hello Mumofdd and welcome to the Forum!

 

I can't comment on your DD's exam experiences but I know many people of all ages who are struggling to try and regain some sense of normality post lockdown.  I've got one friend, for example, who still can't bring herself to go into a supermarket as she and her late husband were sheltering so she had done all her shopping online.

 

A major side effect of this pandemic is the mental harm it has done to everyone whether they realise that or not.  I thought I was OK till I started crying for absolutely no reason whatsoever at the drop of a hat. 

[mumofdd]

It certainly has had an impact on everyone.

 

The examiner sounded lovely and it's clear she wanted my DD to do well, otherwise she would not have allowed her to practice with the music before doing the exercises and dance properly. My DD said this helped and the examiner only stopped the music once in the first exam. In the second exam, my DD said she did OK until the dance when she drew a blank. She had 2 attempts on her own but got it wrong both times, so then the examiner told the girl DD was with to do it with her and my DD got it right that time. 

 

DD will be gutted if she gets low marks and has convinced herself she won't, given how nice the examiner was. How likely does everyone think this is though?

[Colman]

The school in Dublin we mostly attend did exams a few weeks ago and there was all sorts of anomalous behaviour from the kids - the older ones more than younger - so I’d guess the examiners are seeing this everywhere.
 

I don’t know how much latitude they have on marks, but I’d count just getting through the exam as a victory and wouldn’t worry too much about the actual grade. That’s certainly how we’re going to frame it to our son who apparently messed up his Grade 4 character dance completely!
 

Everyone  lost their minds in lockdown, as Janet says, and it’s going to take a while to readapt.

 

We also had a parents class watching  day recently and the kids were very stressed out by that too, having not danced in front of anyone for two years. 

[glowlight]

Now that we are 'back to normal' there is a tendency to feel that we should all feel normal and be able to get on with our lives as we did before.  That simply isn't the case. So many of us are still struggling with some things, and the trouble is you don't know what is going to hit you until it does.

 

It sounds as if the examiner was really lovely, so hopefully your dd won't be disappointed in her results.  But if she is, try to help her to understand that this was a one off due to very strange circumstances.  One result in a long line of results mustn't be allowed to define what comes next.

 

I got completely rubbish A level results due to glandular fever.  Fortunately I had a very pro-active Headmaster who spoke personally to the admissions offer at my chosen university to secure my place, and I went on to get a good degree from a good university.  My A levels were a blip and mean nothing now.

[MamaFrosty]

I’d definitely emphasise the achievement of doing an exam after such a strange two years! My daughter had a similar experience, she did an exam a few weeks ago and despite knowing the syllabus inside out she came out really shaken and had apparently messed up. Sadly, it sounds like her examiner was less understanding but that in itself was a good lesson! We’ve just told her that it’s been such an odd two years, with so much disruption to their learning, that just going in there and giving it her best was a massive accomplishment. We’re waiting on the results but I hope we’ve done enough groundwork that if she doesn’t get the grade she’s hoping for then she won’t feel disappointed in herself.

[mumofdd]

12 minutes ago, MamaFrosty said:

I’d definitely emphasise the achievement of doing an exam after such a strange two years! My daughter had a similar experience, she did an exam a few weeks ago and despite knowing the syllabus inside out she came out really shaken and had apparently messed up. Sadly, it sounds like her examiner was less understanding but that in itself was a good lesson! We’ve just told her that it’s been such an odd two years, with so much disruption to their learning, that just going in there and giving it her best was a massive accomplishment. We’re waiting on the results but I hope we’ve done enough groundwork that if she doesn’t get the grade she’s hoping for then she won’t feel disappointed in herself.

Fingers crossed for your DD.  My daughter remarked on how nice the examiner was, so I am really hoping that because she let her have multiple attempts, she has gone easy on her and will have been marking her on her best attempts!  You just don't know though, do you?  I was really worried that my DD would carry that experience forward and crumble in her ballet exam on Friday, but she said she focused on her breathing and let her feet lead the way.  She didn't make any mistakes in her ballet exam and said that the examiner smiled at her several times, so hopefully that result will be a pick-me-up for her if her other two results leave her feeling disappointed.

[mumofdd]

1 hour ago, Colman said:

The school in Dublin we mostly attend did exams a few weeks ago and there was all sorts of anomalous behaviour from the kids - the older ones more than younger - so I’d guess the examiners are seeing this everywhere.
 

I don’t know how much latitude they have on marks, but I’d count just getting through the exam as a victory and wouldn’t worry too much about the actual grade. That’s certainly how we’re going to frame it to our son who apparently messed up his Grade 4 character dance completely!
 

Everyone  lost their minds in lockdown, as Janet says, and it’s going to take a while to readapt.

 

We also had a parents class watching  day recently and the kids were very stressed out by that too, having not danced in front of anyone for two years. 

Thank you, I'm glad to hear that my DD is not alone.  She has come such a long way in terms of her confidence in the last few years and I really don't want this experience to knock that.  She was only 8 when she last took dance exams... she has taken drama exams throughout the pandemic and consistently received distinctions, but there's so much more to a dance exam and I think once she'd made that first mistake (on the second exercise), she completely crumbled and couldn't pull herself back together.

[mumofdd]

53 minutes ago, glowlight said:

Now that we are 'back to normal' there is a tendency to feel that we should all feel normal and be able to get on with our lives as we did before.  That simply isn't the case. So many of us are still struggling with some things, and the trouble is you don't know what is going to hit you until it does.

 

It sounds as if the examiner was really lovely, so hopefully your dd won't be disappointed in her results.  But if she is, try to help her to understand that this was a one off due to very strange circumstances.  One result in a long line of results mustn't be allowed to define what comes next.

 

I got completely rubbish A level results due to glandular fever.  Fortunately I had a very pro-active Headmaster who spoke personally to the admissions offer at my chosen university to secure my place, and I went on to get a good degree from a good university.  My A levels were a blip and mean nothing now.

Thank you for sharing your own experience.  You're right - these two exams are not the be-all and end-all and my daughter will have many more opportunities to demonstrate her ability.  

[Pas de Quatre]

To be honest I have never understood why dance exams are constructed as they are, and what purpose it serves learning so many exercises by rote. No audition, whether for a school or company is held this way. Nor does it make a student good at learning choreography quickly. 

[DVDfan]

Although it was nothing to do with Covid, my daughter had a very bad experience in an exam which left her having continual flashbacks during subsequent exams. It took a long time to heal, but it did heal and she was able to gain first class honours, eventually.

It sounds as though the OPs DC is well on the way to recovery, but if need be, assure your child that it will improve given time.  

[Ruby Foo]

Well done to your Dd for being able to complete her exam.

She will have gained so much more than a mark ( whatever it may be) going through that experience. Finding it within herself to do what was needed, when everything was against her, is what every professional dancer will come up against in time. Whether it be carrying on in a performance through a malfunction of the music, costume, nerves, lack of rehearsal, an injury or because you've just had traumatic news given to you etc, it's a sign of strength and creativity to be able to see it to the end.

[mumofdd]

Thank you.  I was so proud of her for persevering and for being able to put the experience behind her so that she could have a better experience in her ballet exam just 2 days later.  One thing that may also go in her favour with the examiner is that in between both of her exams, she was a 'student' in the trainee teacher's tap exam.  She said that she was really relaxed in that one and picked up the routine the teacher was making up very quickly.  That would have demonstrated to the examiner how she performs when she's not under pressure.  Although she wasn't the one being marked in this particular exam, it may have helped...

[Pups_mum]

I think young dancers sometimes see examiners as being some kind of alien species and it can be helpful to remind them that the majority are teachers too, who enter their pupils into exams as well, so they do know how the dancers are feeling. In my experience, the vast majority are nice people who want to see youngsters doing as well as they can.

I would guess that the examiner could tell that your DD wasn't dancing to her usual standard because of nerves and I'm sure all examiners understand how difficult it is for children who have essentially been dancing in private for 3 years to now perform in front of a stranger. The fact that she was given the chance to start again sounds positive to me.

I'm reminded of the time my DD came out of a ballet exam in tears. I think it was grade 5 and she'd worked very hard for it and was fairly confident so I was surprised it hadn't gone well. But it turns out that her friend who was the only other pupil doing that grade was ill, so DD had only discovered when she arrived that she'd be alone and it had thrown her. Much like your DD she started off with a bit of a wobble and the examiner had told her to start again. It went ok from then but she was convinced she had done badly because of the restart. In fact she got a Distinction and if I recall rightly, with the highest mark she ever got in an exam. Examiners are human, and they understand that dancers are too! I think your DD might be pleasantly surprised. And if not, she has still learned from the experience and from doing the syllabus, which is actually what matters much more than the mark on a piece of paper anyway.

[mumofdd]

13 minutes ago, Pups_mum said:

I think young dancers sometimes see examiners as being some kind of alien species and it can be helpful to remind them that the majority are teachers too, who enter their pupils into exams as well, so they do know how the dancers are feeling. In my experience, the vast majority are nice people who want to see youngsters doing as well as they can.

I would guess that the examiner could tell that your DD wasn't dancing to her usual standard because of nerves and I'm sure all examiners understand how difficult it is for children who have essentially been dancing in private for 3 years to now perform in front of a stranger. The fact that she was given the chance to start again sounds positive to me.

I'm reminded of the time my DD came out of a ballet exam in tears. I think it was grade 5 and she'd worked very hard for it and was fairly confident so I was surprised it hadn't gone well. But it turns out that her friend who was the only other pupil doing that grade was ill, so DD had only discovered when she arrived that she'd be alone and it had thrown her. Much like your DD she started off with a bit of a wobble and the examiner had told her to start again. It went ok from then but she was convinced she had done badly because of the restart. In fact she got a Distinction and if I recall rightly, with the highest mark she ever got in an exam. Examiners are human, and they understand that dancers are too! I think your DD might be pleasantly surprised. And if not, she has still learned from the experience and from doing the syllabus, which is actually what matters much more than the mark on a piece of paper anyway.

You are so right and I hadn't thought to explain to DD that most examiners are dance teachers themselves.  I guess we will find out in a few weeks how she has done - she was hoping for a distinction in theatre craft and a high merit in tap, but if she doesn't then it's not the end of the world.  She has got those initial post-covid nerves over and done with now, so can move on and look to the future when she'll hopefully be back to taking exams annually.  I was so proud of her for not letting her experience on Wednesday impact on her ballet exam on Friday, as it so easily could have done, but she pulled herself together and was determined to perform to the best of her ability.

[HopelessMummy]

Hey, please give your dd a hug from me. The last few years have been rubbish all round and she's done amazing to be put forward for two exams which she wouldn't have been if her teacher didn't think she was ready. Exams are a real pain, more so for the parents and often don't reflect what a child is capable of.

My second child had a similar situation with her piano exam after the various lockdowns... It was gut wrenching to hear her restart every piece several times and fumble to the end. She scraped through and built herself this fear of exams... We worked tog recently on building her confidence and she took another exam on Saturday. Even though she made a few mistakes, she got through and I'm happy to report I've learnt today she got a merit. 

I'm sure your dd will be fine. Resilience takes time to build and the examiner clearly identified she knew her stuff. Fingers crossed for the results and again, big hugs x

[mumofdd]

My DD passed both IDTA exams with high merits, so her wobbles obviously weren't that bad! 😁

[HopelessMummy]

Hey! Fantastic news. What a little star! big hugs to you too mumofdd! 

 

[Dance*is*life]

I once mentioned to an examiner about the fact that the students sometimes come out in hysterics because they'd muddled some exercises.  She reassured me that the points were not for whether or not the syllabus was shown without mistakes, but how well it was performed!  We all know that even without the stress caused by Covid, exams can be stressful, so for that reason I play down the marks.  For me it's the effort they put in to preparing for the exam that's important.  Those that take the exam always advance more than the ones that don't -  they don't miss classes, they practise, they put in more effort - all that shows in the end product!   The important thing is how much your daughter has improved training toward her exams, not the mark she gets. As I told my students, the fact that they were ready for the exams after the last two years is in itself an achievement!    Having said all that well done on the High Merits!

Edited April 25, 2022 by Dance*is*life