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Posted

Yesterday for the first time ever I had a massive 'panic attack' type episode, followed by a day in bed with a migraine, which I have only ever had once before. It was SO unpleasant. DH and I were trying to work out why this had come now, and the best explanation I can come up with is the last two years of DD doing GCSEs and auditioning for post 16 ballet training has been more of a strain on us all as a family than we had thought at the time. Never mind the stress for DD actually taking the exams and auditioning! The early mornings, late nights, homework and fitting in ballet training, vocational exams, weekend ballet commitments was a real juggling act mostly for myself, trying to keep DD calm and getting her from A to B at the right time, hopefully with more or less the right kit or books (she is actually quite good at organising herself). She got good exam results and a place at the school she wanted, so it has all worked out, but maybe now a couple of months down the line my body is trying to tell me something?! I enjoy good health usually, which I am very grateful for, but I send sympathetic vibes to parents doing through Yr10/11 with DD/DS's.

Posted

It took *me* about three months to recover from my son's GCSEs. He had not been working hard enough in year 10 and things had deteriorated further in year 11 culminating in some disastrous Mocks results even though he had apparently been revising hard. I had to supervise his subsequent revision closely and relations between us were not good to say the least but, happily, he ended up getting very good results which, strangely, did not seem to come as much of a surprise to him (I thought that there had been some mistake and that his results had been mixed up with someone else's!) Thank goodness for revision guides. I don't know what my son would have dome without them in certain subjects. His notes were so poor for the three sciences that he didn't use them at all and just revised from the revision guides. I take my hat off to young people auditioning for upper schools whilst preparing for GCSE exams; I don't know how they manage to fit everything in.

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Posted

I`m thankful the GCSE`s have been behind us for the past two years. I kept saying to my son to motivate him to revise,that if he gets the grades,he can afterwards forget all about them and he will never in his life have to take them again. We know someone two years older than my son. He failed them all. By failed I mean he got grade E`s. He`s doing well now at uni,but he wasted two years of his life having to re-take them from scratch. I told Sean he would be a fool if he were to allow himself to get into that sort of situation. I think if you just say to a young person all this pressure won`t be for ever,and if you do it properly and do it right first time around you will save yourself a whole lot of extra work and stress in the long run.

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Posted

IBD23 I'm sure you are absolutely right about the cause of your bad day. It is an awful stress on parents and often this isn't recognised. ...

Posted

Thanks sarahw. I feel a lot better today I must say. There are international students at DD school who don't seem to have the academic qualifications we tend to expect of our young people. They've done a *lot* of hours per day of dance however, almost fulltime it seems to me. Not so much juggling one against the other.

Posted

The worst parts for me were:

 

Being responsible for all the audition admin, filling in the forms, getting the right photos done (why do they all want something slightly different?) and sending them all off in time

 

Keeping the diary of what was happening and when, and persuading her school attendance officer that yes, she did need yet another day off

 

Praying that she wouldn't be ill or get injured

 

And the most stressful of all - tearing my hair out on the journey to the audition (and pretending to be as cool as a cucumber) so I could actually deliver dd to where she needed to be at the right time on the right day with the right kit. I was never nervous for her during the actual auditions themselves, I was just so relieved that I'd done my bit and got her there!

 

Thinking about GCSE's wasn't even on my radar ;)

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Posted

I can relate to all of the above, not for myself but my poor wife, she has been in charge of form filling, photos, she is the one who is the taxi driver 6 days out of 7 with Dd commitments and is Also in charge of homework / revision .

I have never seen her look so washed out !

This has been a good kick up the bum for me, I need to shoulder some of her burden

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Posted

IBD23 I am completely in awe of anyone who can shepherd their child through GCSEs AND the audition process. Well done and I hope you recover soon.

 

I was like Aileen; coaching my ds (who wasn't auditioning anywhere) through his Science GCSEs in particular. I take all the credit for his respectable results, but he didn't deserve them! I'm just thankful that he hasn't decided to apply for Drama school, with A2s next summer the audition process and extra singing lessons on top of all his dance lessons would just about kill me off.

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Posted

IBD23, I have only ever had what the GP calls 'post-stress migraines'. It's as if your body/brain figures that now you have time to be flattened!

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Posted

That's what I think happened to me. I was not expecting to be flattened and it took me by surprise and scared me a bit if I'm honest. It was worth it most definitely though as DD at dance school where wants to be with good GCSEs behind her too as plan B. Just took a massive effort from her and me to get there! Watching her on stage one day will be doubly sweet knowing I helped get her there lol

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Posted

DD just started year 10 & will audition next year (MT not ballet). After reading other threads I had plans to stock up on wine, now adding pain meds to the shopping list. Or maybe one of you experienced parents would like to take my place for the next couple of years....!x

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Posted

DD just started year 10 & will audition next year (MT not ballet). After reading other threads I had plans to stock up on wine, now adding pain meds to the shopping list. Or maybe one of you experienced parents would like to take my place for the next couple of years....!x

Add some clear plastic A4 folders to the shopping list, some sticky labels and a nice big diary! (or even a famous Katymac-style spreadsheet).

 

Start looking now, and make a long list of the options and how each course is funded, and send your dd to as many open days and audition workshops as you can. It is also worthwhile to let her school know what her ambitions are, and get them on board. You will need a Plan 'B' and possibly a 'C' too (A levels/local college/try again at 18 etc).

 

One of the most helpful things we found was going to the MoveIt exhibition, it is usually in March each year, and loads of the big schools and colleges have stands, also the funding bodies. There are workshops and talks, and many schools perform on stage as well. You will come away with loads of leaflets and information, really worthwhile. DD's school actually let her have a day off on the Friday so we could go, I think they marked it down as 'educational activity'. (Fridays are usually the quietest day and it is easier to get to talk to people on the stands).

 

That's all I can think of at the moment :)

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Posted

Hotel already booked for move it, will ask father xmas for stationery items (spreadsheet skills are a little rusty, maybe DD can do that part!). I've read lots of threads on here but will prob ask for help from time to time. Already having to keep an eye of DD to make sure she gets homework done (trying to juggle that with dance and a social life can be tricky - & I guess it's gonna get harder)x

Posted

Already having to keep an eye of DD to make sure she gets homework done (trying to juggle that with dance and a social life can be tricky - & I guess it's gonna get harder)x

It does get harder, but they need down-time with their friends and a bit of normality, it gives them a chance to just be an ordinary teenager for a while ;)

 

And exams can always be re-sat, whereas you only get once chance in a lifetime to audition at 16 for vocational training (Unbelievably this is what my dd's school head-of-year said to us - he actually understood!).

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Posted

IBD23, I have only ever had what the GP calls 'post-stress migraines'. It's as if your body/brain figures that now you have time to be flattened!

 

I get those sometimes, as well.  Or the "overdone it"-type ones, which aren't technically *post*-stress.  Otherwise it tends to be bright lights and/or cold winds which do it for me.

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