Lifeafterballet

Talking of gymnastics.... https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-56858863 Well done Sarah Voss. Leading the way in women’s sports 💪☺️ Voss explained her decision in an interview with public broadcaster ZDF: "We women all want to feel good in our skin. In the sport of gymnastics it gets harder and harder as you grow out of your child's body. As a little girl I didn't see the tight gym outfits as such a big deal. But when puberty began, when my period came, I began feeling increasingly uncomfortable."

This beautiful tutu is still available ☺️ Open to offers x Chest 30 in/75cm Waist 24 in/60cm Hips 29 in/73cm Girth 51 in/130cm Dd is a petite 5ft 3.

I think my Dd chose poorly in doing ballet 🤔 There seems to be lots of job opportunities in Belly Dancing 🤣

The effects of teachers appearing to judge a child based on their development can be catastrophic. It’s bad enough that they all judge themselves and each other. My Dd was a perfectly happy and developing 11 to 13 year old. At the beginning of year 9 she noticed that it appeared to be the slimmer girls who were favoured. One would eat an apple then run up and down the stairs to burn it off. There were secret evening cardio workouts in bedrooms and a ridiculous amount of sit-ups. My Dd decided to stop eating snacks. The weight loss was subtle to start with then became more noticeable. After the year 9 appraisal I had a telephone call from the Medical Centre nurse who described her as “skeletal”. Those words will haunt me forever 😢 we hadn’t seen her in 3 weeks. We didn’t live close to the school so Dd was unable to travel home every weekend and the internet in the accommodation was poor so FaceTime was impossible. We immediately collected her. She cried and said she hadn’t meant for it to go this far. That year she passed that appraisal with flying colours, won two scholarships for summer schools and was awarded a ballet prize. How could we convince her that it was all wrong when she had so much success. This was the beginning of a disorder of eating and body image that would last for a long long time. The behaviours spread through the year group like a plague. The regular heights and weights started and the “pulling off dance”. There were secrets and whispers. Sadly very few of the girls supported each other. Dd had some really hurtful things said to her. We wanted her home and she wanted to dance. On reflection we should have been stronger and took her out. The environment, culture and the ballet world wasn’t going to get any better and neither was she until she left. She can pinpoint the exact moment it all changed for her and she became unhappy with her body. We were very naive and didn’t really know how to handle it. Sadly, the school didn’t seem to know either 😢 The healing process is a long journey x Please don’t allow anyone to make your daughter feel that her developing is wrong and detrimental to her ballet. Celebrate her beautiful changing body. Dd and I can’t wait to go bra shopping ☺️ A little later than planned but at least we made it out the other side 💪

My Dd was at finals 4 years ago and they really pushed it as a selling point then 😏

Just wondering if there is any happy news for this years, and last years, graduates. I've heard of a couple of “big” contract successes 🤫 The others have been “parent pays” apprenticeship opportunities with the added US/EU visa difficulties. I still get a lot of job pop ups on my social media and share them, but there isn’t a lot about 😢

All items now sold 😌

Ds didn’t start ballet til he was 12 and his brother 14. None of their friends knew. They were both county runners and played school and club rugby, attending county training weekly too. I don’t know how we fitted it all in 😅 Lots of lists 🤣 It wasn’t til Ds did Lord of the Flies with Matthew Bourne and his mates came to watch/support him that he admitted his love of ballet. We even did Elmhurst Associates and then RBS SAs on a Saturday in Covent Garden from our home in Cornwall. The train journey was fab for homework. He went to vocational school at 17 and up til then led a very active normal life. If you can, keep the other activities going. Dd gave up all her sports etc for ballet at 11. She would have had a happier time I’m sure if there had been some sport at her vocational school. I can’t really understand why they can’t play team sports like Netball etc. Something to get them outside and active.

Hello, sorry it has been sold x

I like whistle blowers 😊 Most positive change is initiated by those who were brave enough to stick their head above the parapet and share their experiences. Athlete A comes to mind. The fear is that you would be left standing alone. In my experience, parents are very good at talking about issues between them on their private forums but sadly not brave enough to raise them for fear of repercussions. We stayed silent in a lot of issues that we shouldn’t have 😢

I totally agree with the feelings of loneliness 😢 Having 8 years of “filtering” and “airbrushing” our ballet journey with positive pictures and successful posts I decided not to do that anymore. To move forward with honesty and share the lows and the raw reality of vocational training. As well as the good 😌 Not to slope away quietly and feel embarrassed by Dds decision to stop dancing. We are immensely proud of her resilience and guts 💪 Parents need a balanced sharing of experiences. To know what is behind the glossy exterior and media hype so they can make informed decisions about who they can trust with their child’s care.

Yumiko Anna and skirt now sold ☺️

Zoe now sold ☺️

https://ibb.co/CbyZmN4 Dd in it ☺️

Yes it is x

Our Ds and Dd both suffered injuries in grad year which were poorly managed. Ds was one of very few boys on dance at the time of the grad shows so his rehearsal schedule was gruelling. He sustained a spinal stress fracture which took him off dance for 3 months. His mental health suffered too 😢 There was no sports psychologist or provision for support with this. The physical rehab was good, when you could get it, as there were so many injured students that they were overwhelmed. Dd was accidentally dropped onto a pointed foot and continued to rehearse and perform on a very obvious fracture. The priority was the shows. She was taught how to strap it so she could get a pointe shoe on and she ate a lot of Brufen. There was a culture that injuries were an inconvenience and Dd was made to feel guilty if she didn’t perform. She plucked up courage and asked to be replaced for one performance as she was in so much pain and was reduced to tears by the teacher 😢 She felt weak and worthless. Others just hid their pain 😣 We did a lot of research ourselves and Ds and Dd became very good at self managing. Dd sustained a foot injury whilst performing with a U.K. company and was excellently managed by them. This stimulated her interest in sports injury rehabilitation and is what now she is off to University to study. She learned a lot from her and her brother’s experiences. Both have been far more happier and healthier since leaving and taking charge of themselves ☺️

Now sold ☺️

Yumiko Anna Leotard, size small, nylon and velvet, antique, Misty rose, orient trim. Fabulous condition £50 including delivery. Yumiko Zoe leotard, size small, nylon, silver, antique rose, antique trim. Fabulous condition £50 including delivery. Yumiko Pat georgette skirt, medium length, antique. Fabulous condition £40 including delivery. Bullet pointe XS skirts. Black and white available. Excellent condition. £20 each including delivery. Ballet Skirt by Lucinda, size 6, grey Excellent condition £15 including delivery. https://ibb.co/THNSSmN https://ibb.co/JH2zXdW https://ibb.co/PTP40JV https://ibb.co/pRhCDT0 https://ibb.co/PYmg8py https://ibb.co/0YHzCnQ https://ibb.co/yRFzHMJ https://ibb.co/WF83mMs

Blue foot stretcher. Excellent condition. £50 includes delivery. Pink turn board. Well used 🤣 £15 includes delivery. https://ibb.co/wLHhBVJ https://ibb.co/RPSW79Y

Black Wear Mois still available x

Still available ☺️

Still available ☺️

This is still available ☺️

These are still available and open to offers x And a brand new set of Bloch Zenith pink canvas split soled, size 5c x

All of our lives came to revolve around ballet. We spent most of our time and an awful lot of money on ballet. Do we have regrets ? Yes we do, a lot of them 😞 The main one was allowing our children to be physically, psychologically and emotionally damaged by the vocational system and not to admit it to ourselves that was what was happening. For watching Dd spiral into an obsessive compulsive decline that earned her praise, recognition and success, without intervening. Knowing deep down that the bullying and unkindness was wrong but never having the guts to address it. Pausing and thinking of the consequences of action allowed opportunities to intervene slip by. Watching her passion, personality and happiness be destroyed class after class. Being made to feel not good enough and worthless. If a young person has to hurt themselves to achieve success then there is something very wrong. We regret ever entering the ballet world, we were naive and unprepared. No one guides you, supports you, is honest with you. We regret not pulling dd out in year 9 when it all started to feel wrong. It took until the final year for her to speak openly and honestly and to admit to us and herself that she was a square peg trying to fit into a round hole and she just couldn’t do it anymore. If she had to go on living like that for much longer then the damage may have been irreversible. It was a genuine relief when she stopped ballet and turned down her contract. We feel so very guilty 😢 for supporting her self harm for as long as we did. For letting the demons in and not protecting her. We all got swept up in the ballet world and lost sight of what was right and what was wrong. There are so so many parents out there now doing exactly what we did and my heart goes out to them. When you are on that rollercoaster it is just so difficult to get off. I realise that my posts recently have been mainly doom and gloom and I sincerely apologise for that. I am genuinely a happy, positive person ☺️ But I just want to reach out to those who read this forum and are experiencing what we went through and know that they aren’t alone. That lots of others share the dark side of ballet and although you think that everyone who is successful is happy, they more than likely have the same struggles that you do but are just afraid to admit it and talk about it.