Advice for failed senior associate audition

[Guest]

Help!! My dd has just got a 'no' and I am worried by her reaction. She said only 'I danced my very best and it wasn't enough' followed by total silence. No tears, nothing. She knows we are there for her as I have kept telling her so. I have told her that she is the same beautiful dancer today that she was yesterday, that's it is only one opinion and others may look for other qualities...But not really sure how best to help in a practical way? Should she take a short break from dance? or look to get some additional coaching and get applying for other programs. If anyone out there has been in this situation would really value some advice.

[Anon2]

Was this Royal associates?

[Huddsballetmum]

It is tough - I've been there with my DD.  It's not always the dancing that is not good enough.  My DD was told that whilst she was a beautiful dancer, her body shape (legs not long enough) would not be right for classical ballet.  That hurt as you can improve technique etc but you can't  change your body shape!!    She re-evalutated and moved into contemporary and loves it.  She is on the CAT programme at NSCD and is having a wonderful time.  

 

Unfortunately this career path our DC's have chosen is littered with "No" and "Not this time".  It's hard to take and even harder as a parent to watch.  I just told my DD that I loved her and whatever she chose to do was okay by me and left her to process.  It took a couple of weeks but her love of dancing was too strong.  Funnily enough she ended up with an associate ballet place as well which she turned down to do the contemporary CAT.  Sometimes when one door closes.........

 

Good luck to your DD whatever she chooses to do.  My only advice is hot chocolate and hugs!!

[sarahw]

I'm so sorry to hear that mnemo. We have been there on more than one occasion and it's horrible. I think all you can do is be there for them while it takes its course. Good luckto you both.

[2dancersmum]

Personally I would try not to be too worried by her reaction.  Lack of tears can also be a sign of growing maturity.  Harsh fact of the matter is - the vast majority of them get more 'no's' than 'yes'es' and they have to learn to deal with this and process it in their own way.  There are more applicants than places on all schemes and the fact that your DD did not get a place this time does not mean she is not a beautiful dancer.  It may mean that something about her body shape or her performance was not what they were looking for but equally it could be that she was just unlucky - too many dancers that had what they were looking for and she was simply not in the final cut.

 

I would take my cue from your DD.  She knows you are there for her - if she wants to take a break or get extra coaching, support her but really this is just one step on her journey and there will be many other steps and many other paths she can take.  Many years ago my DD had a no from senior associates but ultimately it did not hold her back.  She still got a funded place at a vocational school at 16 - along with some no's for other vocational schools.  It was not the end of the line.  So give her a hug and help her move on

[Guest]

Thanks everyone for the good thoughts. And sarahw when I liked your message I meant that I take my hat off to you if you have done this more than once. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger I guess.

[Lottie]

How old is your DD?

 

My son's 1st audition aged 10/11, for Royal Mid Associates, was a no. He was very upset but I believe things happen for a reason.

Next audition at London Junior & Senior Associates was a yes.

Now, 9 years later, he's dancing professionally and living the dream after going to Central at 16.

 

Another place another time might see something different that they like and give your DD that chance.

Good luck to her if/when she auditions again.

[Guesty]

My DD is now at 3rd year voccational and its time to audition for jobs. They all catch the train into London with high hopes and some get a yes and others a no. Each audition gives a different outcome. I am learning to love the happy phone calls and accept the text message! She calls when she is over the annoyance of a no. She knows I am here whatever the outcome. My point is to let your DD know that this is a never ending process. Be who you are. Let the passion be seen and that's all you can ask.

On here we support each other so and it really is true. A no today could be a yes tomorrow. Many routes to a happy and fulfilling career.

Be strong. Get wine in.

I am sure your DD will bounce back and find her route. That's the wonderful thing about dance and tge commitment needed. It gives them tools to put things into perspective. As parents we just worry! Our job for life I guess!

Keep us in touch and hugs sent x

Edited December 1, 2015 by Guesty