DancingtoDance

I know I am not a parent or adult, but please take my advice into consideration... First of all, if you haven't already, you need to ask your son why he wants to do ballet. You may be surprised at his answer; sometimes children have more insight than we realise. Obviously if he doesn't really want to dance there may not be much point in him being in ballet, but if he does want to dance, it is only fair that you give him the chance as children should explore their interests and he may regret it later otherwise. Even if he doesn't want to do ballet but wants to do other dance, he may have to start with ballet as ballet is the foundation of most dance - and because good dance studios will not allow him to do things like jazz without a foundation of ballet and without doing ballet. Unless he wants to do a dance form which doesn't require ballet, such as tap or perhaps folk or Chinese dance (I'm not sure if folk or Chinese dance requires ballet?) You may not want him to do ballet because you are scared he is naturally talented - I understand your fears, but to me that is like not allowing him to put his possible talent into use. And no one really is naturally talented; we only have the requirements for certain training - because in anything, no matter what gifts a person has, one needs to practise for many hours and have the discipline to 'build' their talent and put it into use. Of course, there is a lot more than flat turnout when it comes to talent. Then again, there is a genetic component to a ballet body and apparently he has a sister with a ballet body? The only way to find out is to have him evaluated by a person knowledgeable in ballet and/or have him start ballet lessons - I am not suggesting you should have him start ballet lessons just to find out. But if he does turn out to be naturally talented, you should support him whichever way he wants to go. So if he wants to achieve a high level while still dancing recreationally then if possible support him, and if he wants to do ballet vocationally support him this way too - there is always a way for talented aspiring ballet dancers. You do have to take into account needs of other siblings if applicable and other things, but I feel strongly a child with a passion should be supported in that, and supported to take it seriously if they are able to pursue that passion seriously. On the other hand, if they are talented but just want to do it for fun, that is fine too. Of course, you always need to emphasise family (though family time may be a sacrifice for serious training - but you could still treasure spending time together and spending time with a sick family member, et cetera), health and academics (requiring grades that the child is capable of if they put in maximum (but not ridiculous, e.g. overnight) effort - for example some should be required to get a high A*, others will struggle to get a D) and have a plan B. But this does not mean rob the child of their dreams, especially if they are very able - how would you feel if you were a very able pianist and that was all you wanted to become, but your parents forced you to do something else and that is what you ended up doing? You will have succeeded, but not doing what you want to do. If your son spends time in a vocational school but does not become a dancer, he will still have learnt many life lessons. In any case, if your son wants to do ballet, ballet has many benefits (as you know) whether or not a child does it vocationally. If your son truly does not want to do ballet then look into other activities that also are beneficial and which achieves what he wants. Also, some activities are beneficial to ballet (although some are counter-productive). If you take him into gymnastics, be sure that is what he wants and recognise it is counter-productive in ballet and explain that to him, in case at a later date he wants to do ballet. I think (but am not sure) that taekwando may be beneficial to ballet. Thanks for reading this post and I hope you take my advice into consideration.

Sorry, quoted incorrectly. In regards to the last post, please will somebody help me? I finally found out the director is Monica Mason but that's about it...? Thank you for any help.

I think even in some of the most famous, perhaps unsuspicious schools specific teachers have said shocking things/suggested doing scary things, and students may not inform parents for fear of being taken out of the school Really abuse or mistreatment (whether legally or not) of whatever kind can happen anywhere to anyone of any background

Sadly she passed away some time ago She was the founder of Perm Ballet School and has been featured in several documentaries, including 'Captives of Terpsichore' (featured in the 1990s, and after the films many of her students accused her of abuse) a documentary which could be found on YouTube (the description says it shows the last and final exam of Zakharova's graduating class - I think this is a different documentary) and 'A Beautiful Tragedy' In 'Captives of Terpischore' and 'A Beautiful Tragedy' she has been shown slapping students, pushing a student away and belittling and demeaning students Then again I think she congratulated students after the exam/performance (I'm not sure which, or both?) I haven't really watched the whole of the documentaries or know that much either

Throwing a chair really... Then again that comes close to something that is physically abusive and could potentially cause pain/damage which I have heard is done in a specific school in a specific country I hope throwing a chair was not directly at them, either way a student could get hurt But I do realise many ballet teachers STILL are abusive, even physically in some countries I think a great ballet teacher is someone who demands as much as the dancers can give but does so humanely, perhaps sometimes quiet and sometimes more of a strict voice depending on which is necessary at the time, that is also supportive of the dancer and motivates the dancer, is strict but respects dancers as a human being, if for example there is a sign of an injury not requiring the dancer to dance through it or pull it through without taking care (which is just wrong) but telling the dancers to seek medical advice, understand if the dancer has to take care of their injury (but then again for certain reasons many dancers do not do this) Some teachers are considered one of ballet's 'greatest teachers' yet have been shown to be abusive... for example Lyudmila Zakharova There are 'many ways to Rome' (is this an actual quote/idiom, or is there are similar saying or not?), yes sometimes you have to be firm or strict, but it is possible to teach ballet professionally while still being humane, and it is possible to 'cross the line' As someone said on another forum, 'strict is fine, firm is fine, but cruel is never acceptable' Here is a list of what someone thinks makes a great dance teacher; of course, I think there are many more characteristics http://www.danceadvantage.net/great-dance-teachers/ Ruthless is not OK, I think personally I would find many things bordering on 'crossing the line' acceptable, but while ruthless is not OK ballet students are traditionally told to keep silent; this is part of the reason for continuing abuse And also, dance students often see anything related to 'correcting' or 'improving' students, whether their classmates or themselves a sign that teachers see potential in them, which may (or may not) be true, but they often don't see this as a problem no matter the content, context, how it was said, how humiliating it was etc The problem is students may consider downright abusive teaching to be 'for their benefit' and not realise it is abusive, and if they do they may not speak out Hopefully now dancers/students are more willing to recognise and speak out against a problem, but I'm not sure whether this is the reality Edited to add link Edited to fix post

OK I understand, what do you mean when you say 'you don't see it would be different'?

Ok thank you and I understand, all posts/advice by everyone has been useful

Thank you and I see your point about picking up choreography, but the choreography aside would this be different in Upper School, company auditions and/or contract time (if it happens, that is)? I am talking about a dancer who still has a few years, but only a few I think non figurative, fairly clear and not too confusing/advanced wording will be okay

No I am not seeking a particular answer, just looking for opinions/advice, but I see what you mean So I think more than anything it is how the disability affects the person individually, what coping strategies the dancer has and the degree of the disability?

Thank you, I am talking about an individual who likes socialising with somewhat of a 'weird' personality, mostly because of far-fetched creativity and talking about these topics (but then again this is by choice), however I do understand what you mean when you say the vocational school can only offer so much support and issues may become more obvious at company audition time. As for dyslexia, I believe in the Royal Ballet School admissions policy (of course providing the student meets the requirements) for the interview and academic task at White Lodge or predicted or actual results (e.g. at GCSE or A Level) the only question they are looking at is whether they can provide adequate support, that they ask parents to disclose any disability or special educational need their child may have and are committed to 'dealing appropriately and supportively' in the admissions assessment process and that they accept students with dyslexia, English as an additional language and specific learning difficulties and no candidate should be discriminated because of the aforementioned difficulties (dyslexia, specific learning difficulties and English as an additional language). http://www.royalballetschool.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/Admissions-Policy.pdf

Just out of interest, as I stated

Yes, I realised this, thank you.

Thanks for your post. Just out of interest - I know about Darcey Bussell, but what other dancers/actors have made it public that they are dyslexic? Are there any other former or current BALLET dancers (I know Kathleen Rea had a similar? condition: http://www.openbooktoronto.com/news/guest_blog_dyslexic_dancer_kathleen_rea )other than Darcey Bussell?

Thank you for Kate_Ann and Aileen for your posts. Sorry for not being clear; I think I am finished asking about the specific situation per se (but feel free to give advice as I would appreciate it) - I am asking mostly about mild neurological/mild hearing/manageable psychological difficulties, in a professional ballet employment situation, but other advice would also be appreciated Whether they people with mild hearing or neurological disabilities or psychological difficulties should disclose their disability and when (i.e. before the audition, if and when they land their contract or when somehow it becomes apparent) What possible reasonable adjustments could the company provide, or would this not be possible

Thank you Kate_N and aileen for your posts. I am not talking about two different children, not young either. I am also not talking about dyspraxia, not clumsiness (at least not while dancing!) I am talking both about a specific situation (refer to my second post) and other difficulties (not a specific situation) mentioned in the second post, I would appreciate replies to either, I would even appreciate replies to physical illness related - all these things have something in common, but could also be talked about specifically By now, I am forming this conclusion: -it is not necessary to disclose your disability if it does not impact your work or work-related situation (while dancing and while not dancing) -if you will need reasonable adjustments during work, you will need to disclose your situation (if and after you land a contract, or before then?) -if the ballet company cannot provide support, perhaps look elsewhere than ballet However, what reasonable adjustments during could a ballet company provide? Do you think something like diabetes or asthma should be disclosed (again, not a specific situation), if and after landing the contract? I think this should be disclosed, after the contract? The answer where I asked elsewhere said they knew someone who got turned down by good summer intensives when they disclosed their diabetes at the start of auditions, and when they stopped doing this this stopped happening, and that they told after and there was no problem (this was in the US, however). Kate_N, you said educational institutions are bound by DDA but you did not say ballet companies - when I asked this question elsewhere, it seemed that ballet companies can do anything they want. So does this not apply to ballet companies. Edited for clarity

Well I asked this somewhere else to get more opinions and it seems that disclosing your disability may indeed affect you getting hired? And this may seem a crazy question (inspired by aileen, who was very sensible :-) ), but what should a person do if their difficulties indeed involved having great difficulty reading company letters/notices? Or had difficulty understanding certain words in the notice/letter. Could the company do anything about this, and would most dancers be willing to explain the notice to the fellow dancer?

Thanks taxi4ballet for your post; finger crossed for the mentioned child to compete in the Paralympics! :-) I was just talking about any context and curious to what people envision, but I guess here are some contexts: 1. Hearing a friend, colleague or more distanced person say 'disability': referring to them or their child, or a child, or someone else 2. Looking at the word 'disability' for the first time in a book or document or Internet 3. Hearing that a lecturer is going to give a talk on disability 4. Learning from a child or parent that the child has a disability or the parent has a disability Any context, or generally is fine. I was talking more about what disabilities you most likely or most often attach the word 'disability'

Thank you for your post; I appreciate it and totally agree with what you're saying Just to be clear, I was not talking about autism or the person when talking about not understanding counts And I think it is possible to not understand counts (or not understand 1, 2, 3 or 4) and still understand counts (if you know what I mean) and be on time with the music

Just to be clear, this post is related to dyslexia/dyscalculia I think that a person with dyscalculia may not understand counts doesn't mean they can't dance to the count, but if they can't dance to the count then I could see how that could be a big problem.

Yes, the person is actually musical, I was not talking about the person when I talked about dyslexia/dyscalculia

If you mean autistic meltdowns or rage, it would be extremely unlikely to happen with non-family members

aileen Yes, but mixing up right and left, having difficulty understanding direction words, having difficulty counting music/understanding counts I do think there are ways to work around all of these and they may not necessarily be a major problem... BUT what company would hire someone who mixed up left and right at the audition? I don't know.. Or the dancer may develop very good coping strategies, but the specific learning difficulty may become apparent after a rather long time Company staff may or may not realise it is related to dancers' difficulties... but how can they if they haven't even disclosed it?! Unless they somehow become aware, through the visible difficulties of the dancers.

I think in companies, it would be difficult because corps rehearsals are for ALL of the dancers dancing the ballet in corps roles, but it would be less of a problem if the dancers' coping skills are efficient I am talking more about companies than schools

What do you think/think of when you hear 'disability'?