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@Thelittleswans - if you are in striking distance of Leeds it might be worth considering Northern Ballet's Centre for Advanced Training

which offers vocational level training but without having to go away to boarding school.  Students stay at their local academic schools and do intensive dance training evenings, weekends and in the school holidays.

A couple of options which you can order online for delivery frozen:  

https://www.dingdongdimsum.com/products/veggie-patch-for-two

https://www.yorkshirehandmadepies.co.uk/collections/vegetarian-vegan/products/curried-cauliflower (they do other veggie/vegan pies but this is the only one I have tried, but it is delicious)

@Anniedancemum - for me this was the biggest alarm bell in your post.  In my experience this is not normal.

Hi @mumofaladybird - If your dd is err-ing towards contemporary dance It could be worth looking at the contemporary programmes offered through the national Centres for Advanced Training (CATs)  http://www.nationaldancecats.co.uk/your-nearest-cat/

@Anniedancemum - your situation is ringing quite a few alarm bells for you as a parent, and I'm inclined to say, don't ignore your gut feeling.  

Why don't you have a look around and see what other dance schools are available locally? When you have done that you may feel that your current school gives you and your dd just what you need at the moment.  Or it may open many other opportunities.

For me personally, as a working parent, the short notice changes to timetables would be a deal breaker.  I wouldn't have been able to work around it, and it really isn't the norm.

It is some time since my dd was training, but I think it is important to value quality over quantity.

ie it isn't only about the hours of training, it is about the quality of that training.

If your dd is getting good quality training at her local dance school, plus an associates class, that sounds like a very good place to be at aged 9.  Gosh I think my dd was only doing 1 ballet class a week at that age!  Vocational school wasn't on her radar for year 7, but she got bitten by the bug a bit later, ramped up her local training in her teens, and she went to vocational school at 16.

Even if money was no object, you might still find yourself wondering if you've done enough.  All you can do is the best you can with what is available to you given your financial position, the time you have available and what opportunities are available to you locally.

Please don't fall into the trap of giving up everything for this dream.  I know families who have sold the family home so their child can go to vocational school and that puts huge pressure on both the family and the child.  

Do what you can within your means, and try to enjoy the journey.

They are both beautiful names so it's not surprising that more than one person would pick them for different sites.  I'm sure no harm was intended.

I think what I am about to write may be controversial,  but maybe we as parents of dancers need to instil in them a sense of self worth so that once they have completed their professional training they do not dance for nothing, they do not dance for 'exposure'. They realise that an unpaid 'job' is not a job it is exploitation.  This is tough, because for some it will mean they don't get the chance to perform, or they may have to re-align their expectations and take different types of work.  But every time a professional artist works for nothing, they are exacerbating the problem.  

That's not to say that they shouldn't perform on an amateur basis, or to support a charity or worthy cause.  But let's be honest about what it is.

On 20/06/2023 at 19:31, balletbean said:

Ps. We now have a world map on the kitchen wall for all my (not so little) children to pinpoint where in the world they’ve been.  Competition is fierce of who can have the most coloured pins that mark their visits.

Haha - we used to have one of those too.  It only came down when I had the kitchen re-done.

3 hours ago, balletbean said:

No quick road trip or letting the train take the strain so we can watch them perform.   Serious £££ are spent so we can watch them perform & living their best life.

Oh but what an opportunity it is.  I am so grateful that we were able to afford to go and cruise on the ships my dd worked on, not just once but several times. We visited so many places that we wouldn't have thought of going to otherwise (who knew that Puerto Rico is so awesome!)  

Oh @balletmania - you poor thing, that the excitement and thrill of being offered a place is overshadowed by these fears.

It sounds as if you have concerns on two levels.  One being the language barrier - which may be a wider issue than just the pas de deus class if classes are taught in the local language.  The second is your concerns because you haven't done pas de deux before. 

I have no personal experience of this, but my thought is contact the school and tell them your concerns.  They will very probably find a way to smooth your path.  

And it would be wise to start to learn the language before you go.  Even if you only know a few words I am sure it will make your experience much more enjoyable.

16 hours ago, Medora said:

I see the studio’s side, they are counting on us financially. It’s a tricky one as we are definitely hoping that she can return to dance sooner rather than later, she just really needs a break. I don’t want to say exactly what is going on as I think some people on this forum know who I am… 

I really think you need to talk to the studio and explain the situation.  I would hope that in the circumstances they would be sympathetic and do what they can to ease the situation for your dd from a health point of view and from your family's point of view financially.  However I suggest you go into the conversation from the stand point of knowing that you are asking them for a favour.  If their terms and conditions say you have to give half a term's notice and you don't, then you are in breach of contract if you don't pay.  They could (if you are in the UK) take you to the small claims court to recover what is due.  They could charge statutory interest. But I would be very surprised if a studio would want to take this step for the sake of half a terms fees for a loyal student who is having difficulties.

Such a show-woman, leaving a legacy of so many enduring songs.

@Medora - so sorry to hear about your dd's medical problems and I hope she recovers quickly.

My suggestion would be to talk to the school and explain your position and ask if they are prepared to waive the charges for this half term, or maybe take a reduced payment in order to hold her place.

If they won't budge, then if you refuse to pay that would probably sour your relationship with the school making it difficult for your dd to go back in September.

Depending on your dd's age and the nature of her condition it may be appropriate for her to watch classes.  Certainly my dd has done that in the past when injured, but it may not be appropriate in your dd's case.

I hope that the school will be sympathetic and that your daughter recovers quickly.

My view as a dance mum is that an associate scheme is a non vocational/pre vocational training scheme which is associated with either a vocational training school or a dance company.

There are now quite a few schemes which call themselves 'associates' which aren't actually associated with anything.  

What makes a good programme? High quality training, tailored to the individual, which goes above and beyond what a child would receive in their local dance school.

Congratulations @Margate - I think it's really important to listen to those sort of gut feelings.

I'll just throw Northern Ballet School into the mix.  When my dd started there were students ranging from 16 to 26 in the first year.

If she is still interested in going this September, and is recovered from her injury, it could be worth contacting NBS and seeing whether she can make a late application in the circumstances.  

Looking back as a mature ballet mum I now know that flexibility and strength are often two sides of the same coin.

So if your dd is less flexible, she may be stronger than some of her class mates.

She is very young.  Ballet is a long game and I would encourage you, and her to think of it in this way.

Over the next few years she will start to develop the flexibility to go with her strength, just as the hyper mobile girls with start to develop the strength to go with their flexibility.

She is very young.  Don't rush it.

@Dancing_Mae You might want to consider summer courses in the future.

Your dd is probably still too young for the 'big name' summer intensives, but its definitely worth looking into these next year or the year after.

In the meantime, @tutugirl's summer course comes highly recommended by several forum members, and takes children from the age of 6

Don't forget your hairbrush.  My dd left hers in the car with all the excitement of arriving at White Lodge for her first ever summer intensive.

@DailyDancer - the RAD website has loads of useful information about exams.  This might be of use to you https://www.royalacademyofdance.org/exams/reasonable-adjustments/

@Lemongirl - A lot of the cruise companies hold open auditions periodically in the UK.  These are often advertised in The Stage (or at least they used to be, and I see that Princess have an advert for Princess on The Stage website at the moment)

Some have their own entertainment recruitment web site eg https://www.princesscruisesentertainment.com/auditions, https://www.carnivalentertainment.com/auditions, 

Some go through agencies eg https://www.tedgroup.com/casting-recruitment/marella-cruises-production-cast/, https://www.peeltalent.com/careers/

It's also worth keeping an eye on are Disney, who employ dancers in their parks and on their cruise ships - https://jobs.disneycareers.com/auditions

Other people on the forum might have more recent experience which they can share. 

Congratulations to your dd @Lemongirl.

When my dd was looking for work on graduation she applied for just about anything that was going.  

She would look on company's own websites and online job boards (eg https://www.thestage.co.uk/jobs/categories/auditions, https://www.dancing-times.co.uk/category/auditions/, https://au-di-tions.com/category/contemporary-dance/, https://dancingopportunities.com/)

She went to lots of open auditions - this gave her lots of experience.

A lot of contemporary jobs seem to be very short contracts, so be prepared for that.  

My dd decided that cruise ship work was a good option for her as it gave good length contracts (6 to 9 months usually), you don't have to pay rent, and you get to see some of the world.

@Margate - Whilst I have no experience of the schools in question which will help you, I want to congratulate you on your amazing achievement of having offers from all of your choices.  If you are new to the forum you may not realise how awesome that is.

Good luck with making your decision.

If all else fails..go with your gut instinct.

Or...'What's your Plan B?'