Dream dream dream........

[alison]

Horrendously expensive, and going up every week, it seems

[Jacqueline]

Horrendously expensive, and going up every week, it seems

Indeed. I have been looking, almost slack-jawed, at the prices of what to my eyes are bog standard properties. I start in the lower end price categories and can barely find a shed. We sold our flat in Haywards Heath about 17 years ago for just under 50grand and I see the same flat was most recently sold again in 2006, for 178grand. Okay, it is near the railway station and has parking etc, but it was a small, two bedroom property and nothing special. Absurd.

[Petunia]

When I was younger, I used to have a recurring dream with variations.

It was all very confusing because I had to dance somewhere (often I was subbing for somebody else) but I couldn’t find the theatre. Or in the theatre, I couldn’t find the stage or my costume was lost or I had to dance en pointe on cobblestones. I was always, always too late, and rushing, and very worried.

 

That went on for years, and then, one time, I found myself in the dream again, but I wasn’t anxious at all. I even had time to buy a lipstick to go with the costume.

After that, the dream never came back.

 

Last night I had a nightmare about teaching an adult beginner`s class. Now, I love adult beginners, but in this dream everything was awful. The class took place in a living room full of furniture and stuff, there were many carpets I had to remove (one upon another), it was dark and dirty, my music was lost and the students were unwilling.

I shouted at them and I even turned somebody out.

 

Just before going to sleep I had been reading Jann Parry’s biography of Sir Kenneth Macmillan and I had just finished the part about this terrible period in Berlin (my hometown!) and I was very moved and very sorry for him. I think the drama and the chaos just followed me into sleep.  

 

[Fiz]

That makes sense, Petunia.

[Lisa O`Brien]

When I was younger, I used to have a recurring dream with variations.

It was all very confusing because I had to dance somewhere (often I was subbing for somebody else) but I couldn’t find the theatre. Or in the theatre, I couldn’t find the stage or my costume was lost or I had to dance en pointe on cobblestones. I was always, always too late, and rushing, and very worried.

 

That went on for years, and then, one time, I found myself in the dream again, but I wasn’t anxious at all. I even had time to buy a lipstick to go with the costume.

After that, the dream never came back.

 

Last night I had a nightmare about teaching an adult beginner`s class. Now, I love adult beginners, but in this dream everything was awful. The class took place in a living room full of furniture and stuff, there were many carpets I had to remove (one upon another), it was dark and dirty, my music was lost and the students were unwilling.

I shouted at them and I even turned somebody out.

 

Just before going to sleep I had been reading Jann Parry’s biography of Sir Kenneth Macmillan and I had just finished the part about this terrible period in Berlin (my hometown!) and I was very moved and very sorry for him. I think the drama and the chaos just followed me into sleep.  

A bit late Petunia ,but congratulations on Germany winning the World Cup. It was a fine goal.!!

[Lisa O`Brien]

Sorry I didn't respond before now. Thank you for your thoughts. I have thought again about the dream and I am wondering if I have worked it out. I think it may be to do with moving after all. I really dislike where we live currently and hanker to return south, where I come from originally. It is nothing to do with being nearer family or friends or whatever. I am just a southerner at heart and I want to go back down south. No offense to the north! We have talked about moving again and I was against it at first as I felt quite settled here. But I have been back down south, mostly to London and the ballet, a few times to just visit Sussex. When I walk through Victoria Station and see all those familiar place names on the departure boards, I feel so homesick. But then I wonder if it is just rose tinted glasses and maybe it wasn't that great. I don't know. I do know property is horrendously expensive down there now and what we give up here, we couldn't afford there. It might be a mistake to go back. So, my having so much to pack might be a reflection of feeling trapped, that I would just go tomorrow if I didn't have so much stuff. Or it could be that having all that stuff acts as a kind of anchor, stopping me from rushing into a mistake. Or maybe it doesn't mean any of that and is just a recurring dream.

Jacqueline,I can really empathise with how you feel. I am from Manchester originally. I moved to Northern Ireland initially for my son to be close to his aunts,uncles and cousins and because it is safer here,the vast majority of schools have excellent academic records,the scenery is beautiful ,etc.etc. Even health -wise we are better off. When we lived in Salford when my son was a toddler he developed Asthma. Asthma is rife amongst young children in Manchester,as is ,generally speaking,a known fact that people die younger in the city compared to many places in the country. It`s all linked in with poor quality housing,pollution,poor diet,poor education,etc. Salford was particularly bad,and the then Home Secretary Jack Straw made a visit to our notorious Langworthy Estate in the 1990`s to see what could be done. There was a similar scheme in an area of Liverpool,can`t remember which particular part,and somewhere else. Areas of severe socio-economic deprivation. Within a few months of us moving to N.Ireland, Sean`s asthma completely disappeared,he was enrolled at a very good bilingual Nursery to start when he was 3, and crime and the likes are very low, not a bit like the big cities in England. It is safe here,which is wonderful. So,why on earth is it, for the last 2 or 3 years, that I keep thinking of how much I would like to move back to Manchester? For a start, I wouldn`t be able to afford to rent somewhere in a nice area like Didsbury; it would be some awful estate  similar to where I used to live. Financially I would be worse off. In Northern Ireland,Council Tax and Water Rates and Prescription charges don`t exist. I wouldn`t have the spectacular views of the mountains I have now that i`m sure people in England would have to pay a fortune to live nearby. But still, I keep dreaming ,literally,of getting off the train at Piccadilly Station and feeling a warm glow of contentment that I am home. I am on Pinterest,I love it. I have made a board all about images of Manchester,Cheshire and the surrounding areas. Apart from my board about growing up in the 1960`s,`70`s and `80`s it is my most used and pinned board. I find myself looking at it for hours,remembering where Woolworths used to be before the fire in the 1970`s that killed lots of people.Images of how Old Trafford used  to look, before all the houses were bulldozed in 1971 and we all had to move.Photos of the buses in Manc we used to have. I`m certain,if I was to move back I would probably hate it and realise what a huge mistake I had made within a month. But sometimes,I wonder what the hell am I doing here?

[LinMM]

Could this be coinciding with your son possibly going off to College and thinking that it may not be that long before he leaves home?

 

Perhaps you just need to go back for a visit......possibly coinciding with some ballet going? Once you are there you may then get a feel for whether Manchester is truly a possible reality for you or not.

[Jacqueline]

Could this be coinciding with your son possibly going off to College and thinking that it may not be that long before he leaves home?

 

Perhaps you just need to go back for a visit......possibly coinciding with some ballet going? Once you are there you may then get a feel for whether Manchester is truly a possible reality for you or not.

I was thinking just that! If you feel your purpose for being somewhere has sort of run its course and things in general are changing, it is natural to start thinking back and I do think it is something you have to be very careful about. You have so much to lose if you make a mistake, financially and emotionally.

Where you, thequays, live now sounds rather lovely. I am not dissing Manchester, as like anywhere else, there are good parts and bad. Although it is 'home', you could well be looking at it through the old rose tinted specs, perhaps as I am with Sussex. The main difference being I absolutely hate where we live. It has nothing whatsoever to commend it in my view, although lots of folk love it.

We had the house valued recently and were rather disappointed to find it has barely increased  since we last thought about selling. We have had quite a lot of work done since then but nothing that wouldn't be considered just maintenance rather than improvement, according to the estate agent. New boiler, roof etc. Apparently, the property in this area has reached its peak in value. 

As far as moving goes, we won't be going this year but at least it gives us time to really think about what we are going to do and have a budget in mind.

I think LinMM's suggestion is spot on, try just visiting Manchester for a weekend/mini break, go to a show, have a purpose in mind, see if you get that warm glow when you get off the train and still have it two days later!  See how you feel about the reality of living in a big city on a budget. Those Irish mountains and all that fresh air and space may seem very attractive after all!

Edited July 19, 2014 by Jacqueline

[Jacqueline]

Well, this is weird. I had my packing dream again last night. Don't know where I was apart from in some sort of hotel. It was time to pack and although I had the usual loads of stuff, I had absolutely no trouble packing. There was plenty of room in my bag, almost like one of those bag tricks in reverse, where the magician can get an unfeasible amount out of a small bag, I was merrily piling it all in with room to spare, thinking this is easy, I usually can't fit it all in.

I never really got to the bottom of the psychology of this dream as I used to dream it. None of the possible explanations seemed to fit. Now it has changed - perhaps for one night only though - I am none the wiser. 

[Lisa O`Brien]

I don`t always remember what I dream about unless it is something quite vivid. Well my dream in the small hours of this morning WAS vivid enough to wake me up. I dreamed that me and Labour Party Leader Jeremy Corbyn were madly in love with each other and couldn`t stop holding hands and staring into each other`s eyes. Bizarre.

[alison]

Had you been eating a lot of cheese before you went to bed, Lisa?

[Lisa O`Brien]

Had you been eating a lot of cheese before you went to bed, Lisa?

Unusually for me,considering I love cheese,no.!!

[LinMM]

Perhaps Mr Corbyn reminds you of someone you would have liked to have had a relationship with in the past.

 

Or perhaps you have detected some qualities you admire in Mr.Corbyn and would like these qualities to be more part of your life.....not necessarily anything to do with politics of course!

 

But dreams are weird like this.

I used to,have recurring dreams about the underground in London where the track would just suddenly run out or the train started to fall apart or was absolutely ancient and unsuitable to travel on or would end up in the sticks somewhere and had no idea where I was or where I was supposed to be going!!