Gingerbread Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Where in the country are you (approximately)? Perhaps someone will know someone who can help in some way? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jellybeans Posted February 29, 2012 Author Share Posted February 29, 2012 Anjuli, I believe that the school that Famcandance's dd auditioned for is a full time vocational school and, had she been accepted she would have the opportunity to dance everyday. Competition is fierce for these places. Undortunately, there are many, many children out there who desperately want these places and if they were offered to everyone just to "give them a break" there would be hundreds or thousands there, not just the tens that they are able to accommodate. I fully understand this from an artistic point of view. Famcandance, have you sought a reliable, independent assessment of your daughter's potential? It could be that the school in question is indeed being honest about your daughter in some ways but perhaps not giving you the full reason for failing to offer her a place? It is certainly true that, for whatever reason, not every associate of any one of the schools is routinely offered a full time place. Has she tried for places at any of the other schools? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2dancersmum Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 I really feel for your DD and for you, when you only want to do the best you can for her. I am assuming since you had feedback from your audition that it is the school your son already attends. I also know the problems a rural location cause. I couldn't find anything within 1 hours drive, even with the dance teacher's help for my DD to take advanced classes but she suggested contacting RAD, ISTD direct for assistance and we now have found somewhere for her to go in September if she does not go to vocational school. I would agree that the school must have seen something in her dance for her to do the associates class and since they have suggested more in the drama/music field and you mention that she needs to improve her flexibility, is there anything locally to you that she can do to develop in these areas further. Any local youth theatre groups or dance/yoga etc that is not ballet and exam based? If you can work on the all-round dancer rather than ballet focus, providing her ballet is continuing and she progresses through the grades, you may find that gives her more of an edge next time she auditions somewhere. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
famcandance2 Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 (edited) No we have not had an independant assessment and we don't know where to go to get one. I understand that not all associates are routinely offered places at the school, but surely knowing that about 200 children auditioned for an associate place and she got one makes me think she must have some talent. She hasn't tried for any other schools as they are all too far away from us to be viable. I have a ds at one vocational school and an older disabled child at home. It would mean trying to be in two or three places at once if she auditioned any further than the one we tried. I spoke to the head of dance after she wasn't offered a place and was told she had auditioned really well in all other aspects exept the one. Don't know what to think anymore. Edited to answer above post: Unfortunately there is absolutely nothing in our area. I would like to see her do more advanced jazz and tap classes but the teacher doesnt seem qualified to do more advanced classes and won't move her anyway because they insist on keeping the same age group together rather than going on ability. Thanks for your suggestions though. Edited February 29, 2012 by famcandance2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2dancersmum Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Jazz was the same for us, but I believe exam boards have more age guidlines than ballet. I know with the IDTA the school has to get permission and submit an extra form for a dancer younger than the published age and that 6 months younger is the maximum for the child to be able to take the exam. Hence mine are/were both kept in age groups. On the flexibility issue, is it possible to ask both her regular teacher and her associates teacher for exercises she can safely do at home to help improve her flexibility? Bear in mind also that age can play a factor here, I'm sure. My DD was really flexible as a child but as she started to grow and around puberty she lost it. It wasn't until she stopped growing and really started to work at it that she got her splits back and regained some of the flexibility in her lower back. Its not a solution to your problem, I know. I hope you find something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
balletla Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Unfortunately associate classes are full of children who have a real talent for dance but lack flexibility - that is usually why they are in the associate programme and not the full time school. The associate programme IS their chance. In my DD's RBS associate class there were two types of student - those who were beautiful dancers but lacked flexibility and turnout and those who had the flexibility and turnout and were good dancers, but their dancing didn't stand out from the rest. Flexibility can be improved but you need a fair amount to start with to have a chance. I would invest in seeking out a physio experienced in ballet (does the associate programme have access to one? or can they recommend one) and get an assessment of her flexibility. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa O`Brien Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 This reminds me of many years ago i was at Northern Ballet School in Manchester. I started there when i was 12. There was a girl in the class,whose parents spent the most on at lessons there, doing the Modern, Tap,Coaching Class on a Monday night and something else too. She didn`t want to dance professionally [although a few years later she decided to attend auditions, but never got anywhere].In the class, we could all see this girl would never in a million years become a dancer, as her physical make-up was all wrong. Apart from having very large breasts, she had absolutely no turnout at all, not even a fraction, and no instep or arches,and could barely put one foot up on the barre, without having to raise her supporting leg`s heel, she was so "stiff" and completely unsupple. Now, i`m sure most people on here are aware, that a school`s exam results are a reflection, not just of the dancer, but of the school. We were all entered for RAD Grade 3, then 4,then Senior Grade, etc, every year.This girl was never entered for even one exam, not even ISTD Modern. After our exam, when the following week, we had all moved up to the next grade class, [the ones who had taken their exam], lo and behold, every time, this girl was automatically moved up each time along with us, without taking the exam. Naturally, we would all be furious; "Why have we worked so hard for a whole year, learning the syllabus, etc.in order to take this exam,and this girl just gets moved up automatically, without any of the effort?" Of course, i could see the real reason, even if none of the others knew. But,this , apart from i think, not being fair on all of us who had worked so hard to earn that move up the grades, was also not fair on the girl in question either, who, completely wrongly, must have assumed she was so fantastic she didn`t need to be entered into the exams every year. As far as i know, this girl was the only one in the whole part-time,children`s section, this applied to. Again, i can only assume because her parents were paying out a small fortune in fees every term and the school didn`t want her to lose heart and leave. Rambling on a bit here, but how much better would it have been for her if the school had been brutally honest about her abilities[or lack of them] to her and her parents from the start? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BankruptMum Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 It is frustrating when you have a very mixed bag of abilities in one class and I'm sure if a teacher had a class full of gifted talented dancers she would be in heaven. The fact is all the students have paid fees and therefore all deserve to be taught. If there is a child who would not do well in an exam situation for whatever reason it could be emotionally damaging to expect her to participate. Some children are fortunate to have parents with money to support lots of activities that doesnt make the children good at them. If that is what they choose to do with their money thats their decision - as long as the teacher isnt misleading them and they are expecting their daughter to be excepted into RBS! I dont think any child should be discouraged from taking any class which gives them a social opportunity, chance to express themselves musically and artistically or to have the chance to perform in an end of year show - if they enjoy it why not. I dont see why it matters if a child moved through the grades without taking exams - the exam mark reflects what your child has done on that day and then you all move on, how much time and effort others have put into preparing for them exam shouldn't be a concern. Some people dance with a goal of becoming professional dancers others do it for fitness, fun and confidence building, its a very personal thing. Goals are very individual too, unfortunately life isnt fair, and as the original posting was about being cynical this is very typical of why you just need to keep your head held high, worry about what is important to you as a dancer and a person, and not get too involved in why you didnt get through an audition etc., dont look backwards - look forwards, reflection is good but dont miss opportunities because you are too busy looking behind and wondering why! 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moneypenny Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 I'm not sure I wholly agree with the comment that associate classes are full of children who have a talent for dance but lack flexibility, hence that's why they are not in the full time school. There are several other reasons why students stay on associate programmes post age 11 ... not all want to go into full time training at 11, or are indeed ready emotionally. Also there are those who are offered places but cannot take them up for financial reasons and parents who prefer their children not to apply until 16. Also, let's not forget that post year 7, full time places are like gold dust no matter how talented and flexible one is. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amber21 Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Unfortunately associate classes are full of children who have a real talent for dance but lack flexibility - that is usually why they are in the associate programme and not the full time school. The associate programme IS their chance. In my DD's RBS associate class there were two types of student - those who were beautiful dancers but lacked flexibility and turnout and those who had the flexibility and turnout and were good dancers, but their dancing didn't stand out from the rest. Flexibility can be improved but you need a fair amount to start with to have a chance. I would invest in seeking out a physio experienced in ballet (does the associate programme have access to one? or can they recommend one) and get an assessment of her flexibility. Can i just ask are you referring to Junior, Mid or Senior associates in the above? In cases of Junior they are too young to be attending full time school and with reference to the Mid and Sen with so few places going I would imagine the criteria for these places would be very stringent in terms of flexibility etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
balletla Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 yes money penny I was generalising about my DDs RBS associate group and the two broad types of students. Of course there are always one or two who are there because they didn't want to go away in yr7 or couldn't afford it, or their parents wouldn't let them or.... or.... or some other random reason. They are the ones who could have gotten into full time at year 7 but didn't go and are usually the ones that go on to get the gold dust yr8-11 places when they do decide to go away (yes I'm generalising again - yes there may be other people who just took up ballet at the age of 14 and got straight in etc. etc. etc.) amber21 - yes mids. and nowhere near as stringent as you might think. Once you cream off all the talent for the 4 big schools at year 7, the ones that are left usually have a reason as to why they weren't chosen that broadly fits into the two descriptions above and they end up in the mids associate classes. Bear in mind that there are over 100 RBS associate places from yr7-9 across the country. There are a lot who don't even make finals for RBS and Elmhurst when they try. By the way, my own dd fitted into one of those groups and finally you have to face reality..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anna C Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 100 RBS Associate places may sound a lot but not when you consider how many talented girls there are in the country! We all know how rare funded places are at the big four schools for places in Years 8-11. It may be that many children are happier to stick to their Associate Classes and local training and not put themselves through the audition treadmill until it's time for Upper Schools auditions. At my DD's Associate Classes the Assessment process each year is very strict indeed. There are some fabulous dancers on the scheme who may not have been ready to get a place in Yr 7 but to my untrained eye stand a very good chance of getting post 16 training. There are many reasons why those Associates who do audition may not get a place at RBS or Elmhurst for years 8-11 but that doesn't mean they cannot start full time training at 16. I wouldn't write Mid Associates or their equivalent on other Associate Schemes off..... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jellybeans Posted March 1, 2012 Author Share Posted March 1, 2012 (edited) Cynicism or realism? A fine line but, in my mind, there is a subtle difference. Let's look at a hypothetical scenario: Child A applies to audition for a school but is told that there are no places for her year but than she can still audition if she likes. She decides to audition anyway, gets to the final and is offered a wait list place. Child B applies to the school, is told that there are no places available and decides not to audition because there seems no point and it is an expensive exercise. She ultimately hears about child A and feels that the situation was not well handled and wonders what may have been. She knows of other instances where protocols are somewhat hazy. She is, in fact a little cynical as, although she could have chosen to audition, she feels that not everyone interpreted the letter in the same way or was given the same opportunity. Child C applies to the school, is told that there are no places available and decides to audition anyway. She is not offered finals, although she feels as though she should have been given a chance. The difference as I see it is that child B does not get finals because she was slightly misled and child C does not get finals because the artistic staff did not find her suitable at that time. Now, of course, we all need to be realistic and maybe child B would ultimately have had the same result as child C but didn't get a chance to find out. Edited March 1, 2012 by Jellybeans Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachaelballet12 Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Its all confusing if you want it to be. going back to basics it is up to the parents and children how far they want to take there dance dreams because for some it is dream . We as parents can only listen to our dance teachers and accept advice from others in the know . WE can all guess and try to work things out but at the end of the day it is the directors and staff of these top schools who have the final say . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rowan Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 To be honest, I was a bit surprised to find out that children often audition several times, yearly even. I know the schools like to say children develop at different rates, etc, and they don't want to discourage anyone from re-applying, but it had never occurred to us to do this. Perhaps I'm naive! And I think it's worth remembering, re associates places, that some children at vocational schools (not WL) also have RBS associates places that they go to at the weekend. I was taken aback by that when I first learnt that a couple of years ago! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jan McNulty Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Cynicism or realism? A fine line but, in my mind, there is a subtle difference. Let's look at a hypothetical scenario: Child A applies to audition for a school but is told that there are no places for her year but than she can still audition if she likes. She decides to audition anyway, gets to the final and is offered a wait list place. Child B applies to the school, is told that there are no places available and decides not to audition because there seems no point and it is an expensive exercise. She ultimately hears about child A and feels that the situation was not well handled and wonders what may have been. She knows of other instances where protocols are somewhat hazy. She is, in fact a little cynical as, although she could have chosen to audition, she feels that not everyone interpreted the letter in the same way or was given the same opportunity. Child C applies to the school, is told that there are no places available and decides to audition anyway. She is not offered finals, although she feels as though she should have been given a chance. The difference as I see it is that child B does not get finals because she was slightly misled and child C does not get finals because the artistic staff did not find her suitable at that time. Now, of course, we all need to be realistic and maybe child B would ultimately have had the same result as child C but didn't get a chance to find out. I don't have a D or an S but I have found this thread very interesting. If child B was told that they could audition but there were no spaces, as child A was told then child B had the same chance as child A but chose not to take it. I was previously a civil servant. Until fairly recently, in my department, people could sit and pass promotion boards without there being a specific job. It could well be that if the audition had been undertaken then child B could have been put on a waiting list for the eventuality of a place arising. This scenario has been covered by others in the thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BankruptMum Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 I understand where you are coming from but the difference in Childs B scenario is that the family took the decision not to audition, she was never told not to directly - Child B can therefore not 'look back' and wonder what if and why if they didnt enter the race in the first place. As parents we decide whether or not to audition and cant lay blame on the schools systems as to who and why they take the pupils for finals if our children arent even there to be considered. There is no transparency in their systems, there is no 'normal or standard' with regards to shape, intake numbers or anything else and yet we all look for it - I guess when we are all living on nervous energy and desparate for information and results and information can be reassuring, over speculation can be harmful though. My daughter has just been assessed out of Y9 Elmhurst, so I guess I have had huge reason to be both cynical and realistic in these past few weeks. Whilst I dont regret in the slightest the wonderful opportunity she has had there, or deny that the foundation she has received will support her whatever direction she now continues to take, I am almost feeling relieved at getting some control back in our lives again. The lack of transparency and involvement these schools offer is minimal and as a parent I often felt like I was spectacting on my childs life. A position I wasnt comfortable with at all. There is often no obvious logical reasons for their decision making. I can honestly say there is no standard pupil, just those they feel show potential to produce employable dancers. Their decision, whether we agree or not, has been made and to keep reflecting and being cynical about their decision helps nobody move on. We took a step back and looked at the much bigger picture. Within a week we had most importantly asked our daughter what she wanted to do, contacted local teachers, disucssed options, academic schools, etc., and we all came up with a plan we felt would best suit her needs and was achieveable. Her goals havent changed, just her pathway - guts and determination are a huge part of successful dancers, this blip in her training I'm sure wil make her stronger. So cynical or realistic - I say be realistic! 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tulip Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Bankrupt mum I think that you are a breath of fresh air. What has happened to your daughter is devestating, but you have positively moved on clearly showing your daughter that her world has not ended. I understand where you are coming from when you say often you are a spectator in your childs life. I often feel like that, and to feel like that for four years is a long time. Yes it does take a lot of guts and determination but also a huge bucket load of disapointments along the way. The world our children have entered is a very very harsh one and if they are lucky to make it to a company there will also be the same harsh knocks along the way. I could not live in this ballet world, but my daughter loves it even with all the harsh knocks that she has had. Would I allow her to persue this environment again if I had the choice, I really could not answer this question. Good luck to your daughter Bankrupt mum, I believe that this time next year, you will have a very, very happy daughter. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
famcandance2 Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 To change the subject slightly, has anyone ever appealed a decision made by a vocational school? Are you allowed to appeal or does everyone just accept that their decision is final? Would love to know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glowlight Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Sorry to hear about your bad news Bankrupt Mum - wishing your dd all the best with her continued dance training. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pas de Quatre Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Who would you actually appeal to? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pups_mum Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Cynicism or realism? A fine line but, in my mind, there is a subtle difference. Let's look at a hypothetical scenario: Child A applies to audition for a school but is told that there are no places for her year but than she can still audition if she likes. She decides to audition anyway, gets to the final and is offered a wait list place. Child B applies to the school, is told that there are no places available and decides not to audition because there seems no point and it is an expensive exercise. She ultimately hears about child A and feels that the situation was not well handled and wonders what may have been. She knows of other instances where protocols are somewhat hazy. She is, in fact a little cynical as, although she could have chosen to audition, she feels that not everyone interpreted the letter in the same way or was given the same opportunity. Child C applies to the school, is told that there are no places available and decides to audition anyway. She is not offered finals, although she feels as though she should have been given a chance. The difference as I see it is that child B does not get finals because she was slightly misled and child C does not get finals because the artistic staff did not find her suitable at that time. Now, of course, we all need to be realistic and maybe child B would ultimately have had the same result as child C but didn't get a chance to find out. I see what you are saying, but I'm not sure you can exactly blame the school. Of course it depends on exactly how the letter was worded. Obviously it would be wrong if child B had been told outright by the school that they couldn't audition but the others were allowed to, but if they were all given the same information but took different decisions based on that, then I do think that is reasonable. If the school didn't mention the lack of places then people might justifiably feel that they had been cheated out of their audition fee if it then became apparent that there were no places and never had been. And as have people have already mentioned, there may be "no places" but if someone arrives at the audition who very clearly has all attributes they seek, then it makes sense that they'll try and make a place. They probably weren't lying when they said there was no space initially, but things change. My DD has never auditioned for vocational school and nor is she likely to, so I have no personal experience to speak from, but from reading this forum and observing other people's experiences it seems clear that there are many other factors besides a child's talent that determine whether they gain places in schools or schemes or not. Where they live, the family's financial situation, whether there are siblings or not, quality of local teaching and simply whether the parents/teacher even know about the opportunities available must play a part, along with many other things. In your hypothetical situation, there may be many reasons why child A went to the audition and child B didn't. Maybe child A lives round the corner from the school and B is hundreds of miles away. Maybe A is an only child of higher income parents and it's logistically easy for them to get to the audition, whereas B's parents can't afford the train fare for what is almost certainly a "no"? Those sort of things aren't fair it's true, but they are real, affect many families (and not just in the ballet world), and I don't think they are anybody in particular's "fault". The schools may have many faults, I wouldn't really know, but I don't think they can be blamed for that sort of thing. I don't think the parents of child A are at fault either. If they are in a position to be able to make that audition, even knowing that the odds of getting a place are miniscule and they and their child still want to try then why not? If child A didn't go it wouldn't really improve matters for child B would it? And surely any child who does eventually get offered a place at a school that is technically full must have something special about them anyway? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
famcandance2 Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 I would think to the head of dance at the school. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BankruptMum Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 To change the subject slightly, has anyone ever appealed a decision made by a vocational school? Are you allowed to appeal or does everyone just accept that their decision is final? Would love to know. You can approach the Artistic Director for comments but I personally think you would be foolish to question their judgement - afterall it was their judgement who took your child on in the first place. It isnt a black and white world, decisions are made some we will agree with some we wont. Would you want your child to remain at a school in which you have had to fight to keep them there? If the talent/potential is there there will be other opporutnities. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anna C Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 If the Head of Dance/Artistic Director/Director of Dance was the one who took the decision, I don't think there would be much point in appealing to them. It could be worth asking for a meeting with the AD and thevschool's principal, but it's worth remembering how tiny the ballet world is and that you may come across teachers/Directors at any time - they pop up in all sorts of places! Once you are happy that you at least know the reason behind being assessed out, and have had a thorough chat with the staff concerned, I truly believe it's better for both parent and child if they can move forward with grace and dignity like Bankrupt Mum and her DD. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jellybeans Posted March 1, 2012 Author Share Posted March 1, 2012 I can see that child B could have auditioned, but still wonder why communication isn't more obvious. Something like " there are currently no places but that situation may change so do come along to the audition" would be more encouraging!! I wonder if famcandance was perhaps wondering about appealing about the result of an audition rather than about being assessed out? bankrupt mum - that is horrible news. I hope that everything goes well for you and yr dd in the future! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
famcandance2 Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Yes you are right. I was wondering about appealing the result of an audition. We never seem to get too much feedback from these and I was wondering if one could appeal to put your case forward or not. Bankrupt mum, good luck to you and your dd. I would apply other places if she wants to go forward with this as have heard of other assessed out children from Elmhurst getting in other places. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
balletla Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Banckrpt mum - I feel for you and your DD. Really hope everything works out for her and I know what you mean about having control back (and your daughter back!). As for appealing - what is the point? Noone will overturn a full panel of teachers making an artistic judgement. I know someone who appealed to Elm on the grounds that her DD was really ill on the audition day and struggled through it. All they wanted was another chance to audition, but were turned down and told to try again next year. Famcandance - if you are really convinced by your DD's talent, why not audtition for other schools as well? I know you say distance, but frankly, once they are away at school boarding, it doesn't make much difference where they are. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Belljul Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 I think being cynical is a choice. Sometimes when you feel you have had a rough ride, and things have felt unfair you chose to become cynical as it directs some of your frustrations by feeling scornful about the situation or the people involved. But in my experience I become "stuck" and unable to move past the experience in a positive way. Bankruptmum, you and your DD have no doubt had your cynical moments but have chosen not to dwell on it and move forward and as a result you will have a happy daughter. Jellybeans I don't blame you for finding child Bs experience a tough and frustrating one. It is! Hope the experience encourages child B to go for any audition in the future. I find cynicism to be a very limiting emotion, in a similar vein to jealousy. And in the ballet world if we are not careful these two emotions can make life much harder than it needs to be! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BankruptMum Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Thank you all for your kind thoughts, it means a lot. She wont audition for other schools until 16, she has had a great foundation and is lucky to have good teachers back home. Time to brush up the academics and scrape some GCSE's :-) Its only 18 months until she will be looking to audition again so I dont see the need to jump ship immediately. Distance to me does make a difference as its not just them being away from home, it makes a difference how often you can afford to visit or have them home. Can you attend watching opporutnities without it being an expedition? They cant realisticaly take all their belongings with them on a train at the start or end of term so that's at least five trips per year - miles can matter :-) I dont think appealing does any good, we all feel happier and settled when we know why but to be honest it comes down to a panel decision rather than just one person - how many festival adjudications have ended with "another day it could have gone a different way but this is my choice". My daughters assessment was based on peoples opinions, they may be right they may not be - a different panel may have made a different decision, time will tell! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BankruptMum Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 I think being cynical is a choice. Sometimes when you feel you have had a rough ride, and things have felt unfair you chose to become cynical as it directs some of your frustrations by feeling scornful about the situation or the people involved. But in my experience I become "stuck" and unable to move past the experience in a positive way. Bankruptmum, you and your DD have no doubt had your cynical moments but have chosen not to dwell on it and move forward and as a result you will have a happy daughter. Jellybeans I don't blame you for finding child Bs experience a tough and frustrating one. It is! Hope the experience encourages child B to go for any audition in the future. I find cynicism to be a very limiting emotion, in a similar vein to jealousy. And in the ballet world if we are not careful these two emotions can make life much harder than it needs to be! Definitely agree - we all have 'moments' but that's all they should be, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anna C Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 I have reached my quota of "likes" for the day, but great posts and very well said, Belljul and Bankrupt Mum. :-)) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachaelballet12 Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Good Luck for the future for your DD i am sure something good will come out of this in the end what a journey u have been on already and she is so young xx Thinking of u at this difficult time x 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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