Anjuli_Bai Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 I am intrigued by the word "haughty." If I have taken my seat in good time, am speaking quietly to my husband before or during the intermissions (intervals) of the performance, am not interfering with the enjoyment of others around me - how would I know they are haughty? How would they know if I am "in the know" or not - and how would I know their level of "knowingness?" In answer to Willie's question: I think the culture and/or generation we come from does influence standards. But, that doesn't mean we automatically impose those standards we apply to ourselves we also apply to others. I like to dress for the theater but as long as the legal standards are met, I don't care what others wear. The only behavior I care about is when it infringes on my enjoyment of the perforance for which I paid. May I be so bold as to add another irritant - people who come down the row of seats behind me and seriously bump my head without an "excuse me" or any other acknowledgement. Except for the odd incidence when they might not be aware of it. So - I guess that puts me into just about every category of snob, haughty, elite, class conscious (to which class class is an open question) tutter . However, since I don't actually "tut" - my skills in that area need amendment - but I can work on it. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alison Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 I'm saying that if a person tries to behave considerately to others then they have a right to hope that others afford them the same courtesy, and a right to be upset if that is not the case. That is not a cultural issue, nor is it a class issue borne of any sense of superiority. I agree, but hope springs eternal ... I'm not convinced it works, any more than I'm convinced that, for example, my keeping my TV, music and general noise down to a level where it's unlikely to impinge on my neighbours will persuade them to do the same. More likely, they'll just take the absence of friction/intrusive noise as the norm, and not realise that it actually takes some effort to make it that way BTW, Lindsay and I clearly have a different definition of "cultural": mine refers to the way things tend to be done in a different country or culture, e.g. "Russian" dancers taking curtain calls at the end of each act, whereas hers appears to be more of an individual thing. I have to say, though, in all my years of ROH-going, I don't ever remember hearing any regulars bitching about a dancer's or singer's weight. Expressing concern that someone was looking rather thin, or saying that someone's tutu was very unflattering to her, perhaps, but not bitching. Perhaps I just don't stand in the right places ... 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneMarriott Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 . Another reason why I don't leave as soon as the curtain comes down... which come to think of it really annoys me... but then again, I don't know why they are leaving... . Guilty as charged. But only when standing or when we've been lucky enough to get seats at the end of the row - and we try to leave tactfully e.g. only moving when the curtain is actually down, not when the leading ballerina is taking her bow! The reason? To get out of London before the motorway closes for overnight repairs - at its worst it can take the best part of two hours to drive the 25 miles home. Or to get to Waterloo in time to avoid the half-hour wait for a train on our branch line. All this is mainly out of consideration for our dog who has been left for six hours with an ever-extending bladder ... 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taxi4ballet Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 I was reading a book of humorous definitions recently that I picked up from a charity shop, (and can't put my hands on just now so I can't tell you the author). The definition of the word audience? Coughing B******* ! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aruna S Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 I've learned something new from this thread - there's a limit to the number of 'likes' one is allowed each day. I agree with what many posters have said about consideration for others and respect for the performers, which is not snobby behaviour in my book. Personally, I fall into the category of the middle-aged (though not by the new standards), but neither haughty nor overweight. I'm also not British so I'm a little amused by the British upper class label. Basic good manners, as in consideration and respect for others, are universal IMO. I am guilty of often leaving as soon as a performance ends, because I have to run to catch a train. But I always sit at the end of a row or change places with someone at the end of a row if I don't manage to get the right seat. Naturally, on those rare occasions when I don't have trains to catch, I love staying to the very end. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tomuchtallent Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 In schools when teachers give assembly are the children allowed to eat crisps,chat away,play with phones,of course not.If your at a business meeting you can't turn up late or chew gum and stick it on the chair.So why would people do this elsewhere?dosent matter where you are or what your doing having respect for what's happening around you has nothing to do with class,culture ect 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hfbrew Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 (edited) I am very offended by the assertion that our wanting to be able to enjoy a performance that we.ve paid for without people using phones, eating, excessive talking and walkiing in and out is deemed a cultural thing when I call it good manners. Why am I offended? Because I live on a council estate in one of the least affluent areas of the UK. I have worked at many schools where the vast majority of children are on free school meals but they and my neighbours have been amongst the most considerate people and well mannered Ive had the pleasure to know. Good manners is not exclusive to the so called middle and upper classes. If anything most of the inconsiderate behaviour described on this forum has actually been from that area of society. Consideration to ones fellow human being is Universal. whatever backgound or culture they are. Having said that it doesn't hurt us to be aware that some people may have sadly been put off going to certain events such as concerts or Ballet because of snobbish behaviour. I have certainly seen people who appear to be "lording" it over everyone else (probably not intentonally) but it really doesn't bother me as I am there to watch hopefully a decent performance. And I enjoy people watching too... If I worried about what people think, I'd never go anywhere. Edited September 26, 2012 by hfbrew 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BankruptMum Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 Surely it comes down to the basics of having respect and appreciation for what is going on around you regardless of whether its the theatre, football ground, cinema or shopping centre - something widely lacking in all walks of life nowadays. A large proportion of people now tend to live their lives in a very solitary fashion, communicating via electronic means rather than face to face and a lot of social skills are not learnt or passed onto younger generations through experience, this I feel, is producing a very selfish/insular style of behaviour. Guilty as charged as an official "tutter" - I have often 'tutted' or made some comment as a person I have stood and held a door open for has just walked through with no word of thanks - very few feel its important to set an example to others nowadays - too wrapped up in their own world to think their behaviour could influence anyone else. I seem to remember Cinemas/Theatres didnt used to sell crisps/sweets which came in noisy wrappers - perhaps my memory is getting dim and foggy ;-) 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Macmillan Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 OK, so what if audience behaviour becomes audience participation? http://thestir.cafemom.com/toddler/144046/little_girl_keeps_interrupting_ballet 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anjuli_Bai Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 The older child certainly takes it in stride. Good for her! (I don't think it is ballet - perhaps a sort of gymnastic floor routine?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pups_mum Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 "You could after all go to any football match or rock gig as a newbie and feel welcome and relaxed (from the perspective of not being tutted at by your fellow audience members - I'm not saying you have to enjoy the sport or music)" phew, that's not the same as a good number of football matches I've been to Lindsay! although I did once think a group of Chelsea fans were about to become very 'welcoming'. I was about to say something similar Stirrups. I think all events - sporting, theatrical, musical etc - have their own codes of behaviour. Some are more complex or obvious than others, but they all have them. I'm sure there are snobby, haughty people who watch ballet, just as there are violent, ill educated people who watch football, but to tar all, or even the majority of ballet watchers as intolerant is as wrong as claiming all or most football fans are thugs. I think some jokey comments on this thread have been taken a bit too seriously. Yes, as a short person I do sometimes wish that I could stop 6 footers sitting in front of me, and i might joke that it would be nice for theatre seating to be arranged so that never happens, but i know that that's not realistic or reasonable really. I think that lots of the posts earlier on in this thread were quite light hearted in an "if i ruled the world" kind of way. But on the other hand, some of the things that people genuinely would like to stop, like people talking or texting during performances are equally applicable to the local cinema, or a talk at the zoo as they are to the ROH. I really don't think it's elitist to want to be able to properly see or hear something you've paid for! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toursenlair Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 (I don't think it is ballet - perhaps a sort of gymnastic floor routine?) Looks like rhythmic gymnastics. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zxDaveM Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 The definition of the word audience? Coughing B******* ! hahahha! - yes, sometimes its sounds more like the consumption ward than an auditorium! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Q Fan Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 I am slowly getting tired of theatres now, to the extent I feel like packing it all in. It was no better when I went to Phantom. Society in general is "all about me me me" and this is reflected in the theatre. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie 2 Milner Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 Can't let that go. There are still very decent people around. Last week my beautiful London Black died in a very difficult spot. A lady runner offered to help then this amazing young man , all dressed for work stopped and insisted on helping. We managed to move to a safe place and he waited until the AA had confirmed they were coming. At Jesus Christ Superstar the other day had hilarious conversations with people about Ninjas (too long a story). Most people are decent. Sadly those that aren't make more impact. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anna C Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 I agree Julie. Although sometimes it may feel that the public are becoming ever more insular and less concerned about others, on the whole I still find many kind and friendly people. We've had lovely chats with other theatre/ballet-goers. Mind you, I do find that more and more people on the tube are determined to sit in the priority seats for disabled/elderly/pregnant travellers and not give their seat up. That makes me sad. But that's another story. :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tomuchtallent Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 Well ive learnt that my like button does not work!i wanted to like so many different comments,Also i cant reply at the bottom and have to go to the top! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alison Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 I seem to remember Cinemas/Theatres didnt used to sell crisps/sweets which came in noisy wrappers - perhaps my memory is getting dim and foggy ;-) Well, the New Wimbledon Theatre, for one, is now selling (big, chunky) sweets unwrapped in a plastic tub, which I hope reduces the disturbance level, although I expect there is probably still some noise from the individual sweets clunking against the sides of the tub. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MAB Posted September 27, 2012 Share Posted September 27, 2012 Loved this survey in The Telegraph about irritating behaviour on planes. Actually it corresponds very well to theatre behaviour. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/picturegalleries/9570325/Irritating-in-flight-habits.html One worry on planes doesn't make the list though as I once asked to be moved when I found myself next to someone who admitted he was suffering from flu (and it was a thirteen hour flight). I suppose the theatre equivalent of that is when you see kids with spots that look contagious, not a common sight in theatres but I have seen it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie 2 Milner Posted September 27, 2012 Share Posted September 27, 2012 Well very topical theatre outing tonight. We went to an Elvis tribute thing locally. Actually it wasn't good so we left at half time. Something I never do. The audience was only about a third full. A guy 4 rows behind me (empty rows) went up and down the stairs and in and out a few times. I thought he was old and infact at one point as he came back up the stairs he nearly fell into me. At this stage I was sympathetic but then soon realised he was drunk. Just towards the end he started a conversation on his phone. No kidding. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alison Posted September 27, 2012 Share Posted September 27, 2012 One worry on planes doesn't make the list though as I once asked to be moved when I found myself next to someone who admitted he was suffering from flu (and it was a thirteen hour flight). I suppose the theatre equivalent of that is when you see kids with spots that look contagious, not a common sight in theatres but I have seen it. I once went to a performance, I think it was Matthew Bourne's Swan Lake (so that doesn't narrow it down that much ), where there was a child near us who kept hacking the entire time. My friend and I were surprised that we didn't come down with anything afterwards. I suppose the theatre ticket was probably cheaper than paying a babysitter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taxi4ballet Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 My dd has a tendency to come down with a bug of some sort whenever I've bought expensive tickets for anything! Either her or me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jan McNulty Posted October 5, 2012 Author Share Posted October 5, 2012 At a recent Northern Ballet performance of Ondine I was desperately trying to quell an unexpected cough. It ended up coming out as some sort of hideously loud snort and I was very embarrassed. On Wednesday afternoon this weekI could feel a cough coming on and didn't try to stop it and it ended up being much more discreet. I sometimes think there is more dust in the air in a theatre auditorium and perhaps that causes unexpected coughs and sneezes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MAB Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 I sometimes think there is more dust in the air in a theatre auditorium and perhaps that causes unexpected coughs and sneezes. You are quite right, in Russian theatres the minute the curtain comes down a troop of Babushkas arrive with dust sheets to drape over the seats. Plush on the seats are dust magnets, give a seat a sharp blow with the palm of your hand and watch the dust fly out. Only way to avoid sneezes is take an anti histamine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taxi4ballet Posted October 8, 2012 Share Posted October 8, 2012 Dry ice makes me cough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jan McNulty Posted October 8, 2012 Author Share Posted October 8, 2012 Me too! Mind you it serves me right for usually being in the front row - I'm right in the line of fire! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bangorballetboy Posted October 8, 2012 Share Posted October 8, 2012 Dry ice makes me cough. It shouldn't - it's only carbon dioxide and there's plenty of that in the atmosphere already. Smoke from a smoke machine, on the other hand, may make you cough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taxi4ballet Posted October 8, 2012 Share Posted October 8, 2012 Dry ice and smoke machines both make me cough - odd, I know. Co2 is worse, actually, as it gives me asthma as well! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Q Fan Posted October 8, 2012 Share Posted October 8, 2012 I blame fierce air conditioning for drying the air and causing coughs. Worst culprit for me is The Birmingham Hippodrome which is usually freezing even in summer closely followed by the Coli! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alison Posted October 8, 2012 Share Posted October 8, 2012 Worst culprit for me is The Birmingham Hippodrome which is usually freezing even in summer I had to move on Friday because it felt as though I was sitting under an air-con duct. Not sure whether that was possible, though. Sadler's Wells' second circle is even worse, though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aileen Posted October 8, 2012 Share Posted October 8, 2012 (edited) Actually, the auditorium at the Coliseum can also be unbearably hot even early in the year. When my daughter and I attended the first of the Beyond Ballets Russes programmes in March (when, to be fair, it was unseasonably warm) she was really flagging in the heat. We always sit high up, either in the Upper Circle or in the Amphitheatre, which I suppose will be hotter on the basis that hot air rises. I don't know if the stalls are cooler. I generally find theatres too hot rather than too cold but perhaps that's just me. Edited October 8, 2012 by aileen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bangorballetboy Posted October 9, 2012 Share Posted October 9, 2012 Actually, the auditorium at the Coliseum can also be unbearably hot even early in the year. When my daughter and I attended the first of the Beyond Ballets Russes programmes in March (when, to be fair, it was unseasonably warm) she was really flagging in the heat. We always sit high up, either in the Upper Circle or in the Amphitheatre, which I suppose will be hotter on the basis that hot air rises. I don't know if the stalls are cooler. I generally find theatres too hot rather than too cold but perhaps that's just me. ROH was very warm last night - I was dripping at times (but that might be because I was so close to the stage). Felt for the jacketed-gents in the pit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porthesia Posted October 9, 2012 Share Posted October 9, 2012 I cannot attend a perormance of any sort unless I have a bottle of water and a packet of Tunes or other throat sweets. It started years ago when I was at an adjuciation of dd's Performing Arts school and I started to cough (I was recovering from a bad cold) I was mortified that it was during another child's performance and it has now become a real thing with me. I am afraid I have to suck a Tune (as quietly as possible and it is possible) and I try to buy end of row seats or as close as I can just in case I have to remove myself. I am really terrified of distracting the performer and ruining other people's enjoyment. I sometimes find that it's during the 2nd half of the performance that this happens and one man's aftershave at the RSC was very nearly my downfall! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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