glowlight

How have I never read this thread before? It is gold.

Wishing Adrian a quick and smooth recovery, and wishing you @Michelle_Richer comfort, strength and as much ballet as you can manage. You are doing an amazing job looking after him. Make sure you look after yourself too.

I'm so happy to hear this. It sounds as if you have a good teacher and you are wise to respect her opinion.

As others have said, I would be guided by your regular teacher. She knows your dd best, and what's more you can't really ask her to let your dd go en pointe if she doesn't think she is ready. Your option would be to change schools. Having said that, it might be worth having a word with the associate scheme to see what their view is. It may be that a message has been lost in translation on the way home!

Great admiration for all you mature dancers still dancing. Even if jumps are now risky, just think how much all that weight bearing exercise is strengthening your bones.

It must be so hard when you get a no for your first audition, but as other posters have said, different schools look for different things so a no from one really doesn't mean you will get a no from all of them. That is why you don't put all your eggs in one basket when it comes to auditions - spread the net a bit. Very few people have the luxury of a choice of offers when it comes to upper schools - and I have to say I don't really envy those who do because it must be a difficult choice to make.

That is shocking!

How heartbreaking for you and you child @Howdoyouknowwhentoquit. I can't claim direct experience as my dd didn't go to vocational school until she was 16, but she still suffered with homesickness and in the end used to come home every weekend. It worked for her, but was only possible because we weren't too far away and she was old enough to travel on her own. As others have suggested I would reach out to the pastoral staff at the school and seek their help. Make it clear that this is more than just a temporary blip and is becoming all consuming. You really want to try to get them out of that negative spiral as soon as possible. A couple of other ideas and thoughts: Could you try to restrict the contact with you to say morning and early evening? Homesickness is always worse the more tired they get, and contact with you late evening may not be helping them to get a good night's sleep. Maybe speak to the house parents about how to make this happen Send post - letters, postcards, something nice from home. If you do this regularly it can become something for them to look forward to. For a while, stop trying to look for the positives, take the approach of...let's just get through to the end of term and then we can think about whether it's the right place. Make it clear that they don't have to stay if they don't want to. Do tell them that other people will be feeling homesick too. Just because their room mates appear settled doesn't mean that they are. People can be very good at hiding how they feel Are they being bullied? Another one for the staff if you think this might be the case Remember that some people struggle to settle at a normal secondary school without all the added stress of boarding. There's a lot of change happening for your child so it's not surprising they are finding it tough. If you get to the point of deciding that it isn't the right place for your child (probably a mutual decision between you and them) there is absolutely nothing wrong with you taking them out of that school. If they still want to pursue a dancing career there are many other ways to make this happen. Perhaps in the background you could start to explore what the options are if they do decide they don't want to continue at vocational school. Look into what local school they could transfer to? What options there might be for training closer to home? Hope some of this might help a little. You are not alone.

Wow - congratulations to your son @Ballet4Boyz. What an amazing opportunity for him.

I expect that the examiner noticed a marked difference in your performance after your injury and could probably see the pain on your face. I think it is well worth applying for 'Special Circumstances'. I think this sort of circumstance is exactly what it is designed for. Hope your recovery goes smoothly. It sounds very painful.

Thankyou so much to everyone who has been in touch to offer to review my novel. I am amazed and overwhelmed. I've now sent it out to a couple of people, which is probably enough for now to keep it manageable. This is really an amazing forum.

I know that Northern Ballet run programmes tailored to people with various disabilities. https://northernballet.com/join-in/inclusive-dance

Some of you will remember from my posts in 2020 that I have been working on a a novel about an 11 year old girl starting at vocational ballet school. Many of you helped me along the way by answering my questions about life at vocational schools. It has now been through a number of edits (and one complete rewrite). It has been reviewed by fellow writers, but I feel I could really do with someone with more detailed knowledge of ballet to look at it to make sure I haven't got anything technically wrong. I am looking for a ballet teacher, or trained dancer, who is familiar with the UK vocational school system and has time to read a 42K word draft and give me feedback. It is aimed at children aged 8 - 12 years, so it would also be nice to have a ballet loving child read it if anyone would like to volunteer their dd or ds. Feel free to pm me if you think you could help.

@BallerinaMum13 - congratulations to your DD on her recall. Anything further is a bonus and if it's down to her height...well there's nothing she can do about that. Rest assured that will likely even out over the years as people have growth spurts at different times.

To me this is key...if she doesn't want to move and if you were to push her in that direction you risk that she may just give up completely To my mind this is gold dust - your dd's teacher has worked professionally in the sphere of dance that your dd wants to be in, so she has direct experience. Take advantage of that. If you move her to another school which is more ballet focused she may find herself pushed in a direction she isn't happy with. That sounds fine to me. Classical ballet isn't her dream. Yes she probably has to do some classical ballet to become the best contemporary dancer that she can, but it's fine that her passion lies with contemporary. Give her every opportunity you can to channel that.

The suggestion I always give to this sort of question is - talk to your dd's teacher about her aspirations to be a professional dancer, and your concerns over whether she is doing enough of the right sort of training. Most teachers will do what they can to help students to achieve their goals. Your teacher might be willing to let your dd go to an additional ballet class each week at another local studio. She might suggest other opportunities or openings. It is also important to be guided by your dd. What does she want to do? What does she feel that she needs?

Lovely to hear someone saying something positive about A&E. Hope you heal quickly @JohnS

Wow - Denton is quite a trek from Central Manchester.

Fair enough - and well done you for going into this with your research done and eyes full open with regard to funding. An informed choice of 5 to 6 schools (as you have) is probably a good number to go in for.

It looks as if you have a good selection of suitable courses on your list given your DS's preference for classical ballet. If he will be joining after finishing A levels, I think it is good to consider, not only whether a school is prepared to take a student who is over 18, but also whether there are likely to be other students of the same age there with him. I can imagine if you were the only 18/19 year old amongst a class of 16 year olds it might not be easy. When my dd went to Northern Ballet School (many years ago) there was a broad age range in her year group. As well as a mix of 16 year olds and 18 year olds there were a handful of older students too. Another course to consider might be https://www.rcs.ac.uk/courses/ba-modern-ballet/ I have no personal experience but my dd knew a few people who went there and they seem to produce excellent dancers.

I can't help with your que3ry @ArucariaBallerina, but Congratulations on your contract.

Sometimes it's difficult to separate our own anxieties from our children's. As much as you need to support your dd with things to look forward to in the forthcoming months, I suggest you try to plan things for yourself..things that you might not have been able to do if she was at home. Maybe plan some concert or theatre visits, or sign up for an evening class that you wouldn't have been able to do if you were ferrying dd to dance classes. If you have other children at home plan special things to do with them as they will miss their sister. It will be an adjustment period for all of you.

Whatever your reasons for not wanting your child to go away at 11, you are not being selfish. You have to do what is right for both your dd and the rest of your family. If you really can't afford it, it would be more cruel to let her audition and then have to tell her that she can't go if she was successful in getting a place. If it's a case of you can afford it with funding, and you would be prepared to let her go if she was successful, then you would have to go into the process with the clear understanding that if she didn't get funding she can't go. Even with funding there are a lot of additional expenses....mind you it's not cheap to get good quality dance training if she stays at home. I would suggest you research all the options, all the different vocational schools and all your options for training locally with a good associates scheme and then you will be better armed to make the decision. And I don't think she will resent you if your reasoning is rational, especially if you agree that she can try when she is older if she still wants to.

As others have said, it sounds quite normal that she is anxious and emotional. I mean even moving from primary to high school can make kids really anxious and that's without the added 'unknown' of being away from home. We didn't have to go through this until my dd was 16, so in some ways it was very different, but we still had 'wobbles'. A few suggestions: 1) Start to plan with her some things she can take with her to remind her of home when she is at school. Maybe her favourite duvet cover, some pictures of family and friends, music she likes to listen to. 2) Maybe plan what you are going to do together at Half Term, and at Exeats if you have them 3) Can you reach out to find other kids starting in the same year as her? Maybe if she could chat with others or even meet up that might help 4) As above but older students at the school she is going to. There may be folk on the forum who can help 5) Talk about whether there are any specific things she is worried about - the toothpaste example is a good one, this kind of thing can get blown up out of proportion in the worrier's head. 6) Try to move her away from thinking of it as 'leaving home.' Home will still be home - she is simply going away to boarding school during term time. 7) Make sure she knows that she doesn't have to go. That if she has changed her mind that's OK and you will make it work so she can still do ballet etc (OK - you may not be happy with this one but I think it's important that she knows she still has a choice). Hope this helps a little.

This question has been going round in my head quite a bit, so apologies for changing the subject... With regard to the current Y9 cohort at RBS, if there are only 2 British girls going into Y10 - what happens to all the MDS awards? I presume that the overseas students aren't eligible to receive MDS? So are the unused funds knocking around somewhere?