Jump to content

Not going to vocational school!!!!


Recommended Posts

Has anyone got any experience of deciding not to go to vocational school but keep up training in evenings etc. My DD who would be year 7 got to finals of RBS but did not get a place. Got a place at RBS Spring & Summer courses & was offered a place at YDA which she loves as she is an associate. Wait listed for MA's. She feels though she is not quite ready to leave home, also not sure we can afford all the fees & costs involved. We have an amazing local teacher who she will do 10 hours training with. She is super chilled & is always happy to go with the flow! She has a place at our local grammar school which if we turned down would be pretty impossible to get a place further down the line.

 

As a family we are all really close she has 2 brothers & I think when it came to it none of us could cope with the thought of her going!! She is so young! Now I feel I will have stuffed up her life by her not having the 'vocational school' experience??? Especially as YDA were really keen for her to go. Any stories good or bad much appreciated! Obviously it will be tough doing all the school work & dancing but she does have bags of energy!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Dancer, you will get other more helpful replies but I just wanted to say that in New Zealand we don't even have vocational schools at age 11 and people still become professional dancers, some carrying on with normal school; some doing home-schooling or correspondence; and some go to private schools where they can dance and do school (but usually only from age 14 or 15). There's definitely more than one way to a dance career, thank goodness as I imagine there are plenty of 11-yr-olds not ready to go away to school! Yours is obviously very talented and so I encourage you to not feel that your DD is missing out 😁

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ahhhh thanks for that Cara!! I just think also just thinking about her 'mental health' & happiness I think she & I need each other!! feel so lucky to have her as she is so lovely(biased I know) but I just know how happy she is at home with us and all her friends she has where we live. But she loves ballet so much don't want to deny her of the opportunity but financially it would stretch us to the maximum then I start thinking  what is it all for as careers in ballet seem so impossible to come by apart from the lucky talented few. Then reading about all the pressures that these young people are under. Just feel I have to be realistic! God I don't know being a parent is hard! My sister lives in NZ perhaps we should move there!!!

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

if she keeps dancing  and  taking the chances to develop  it doesn;t close the  door at  14/15 ( y 10 entry)  or  for upper school   whether that;s  at 16  or 18  ( or  degree courses with A levels at 18  if a broader  dance/ performing arts  career or teaching career then appeals).  plenty of people  have big career  swerves  at all ages  in all settings. 

the fact that  other teachers were pushing  , suggests  she has the talent  and  ability -   but  if it;s the wrong choice as a person  it;s a waste ...  and  people do point out there are some opportunities  for Y8 and Y9  although that does depend on individual schools and that attrition rates 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I know how you feel.

 

DD is going into yr 9 in September, and would love to go to vocational school, but we haven't auditioned, as I feel she is still too young to be away, and actually, when we discuss 'the future' she is really only thinking about going somewhere at 18 ... we'll see. I do worry about them going away so young, and also I agree with the 'what is it all for' as careers are few and far between in reality.

 

DD dances 10/11 hours a week, with a scholars class every other week, and a private lesson/practice space in the hall on her own ( without teacher - just space to dance! ) most of the other week she doesn't have scholars.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Vocational school is not for everyone. My dd always wanted to go and it was the right thing for her. I also know of plenty of dc who did not go to vocational school until 16. It is entirely possible, as long as you have enough quality training locally. Go with what is right for your child and do not be tempted to get either carried along on the vocational roller coaster or out of one’s depth financially. There are so many pitfalls and many children do well just to get through training. Upper school is tougher than lower school and the industry and work is even tougher. It is a journey to be taken one step at a time with your eyes wide open. 

  • Like 8
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My Dd had vocational offers funded but she decided on performing arts day secondary school (830-430 16 hrs is performing arts)  and to top up with grades classes/Associates where needed or flex attend with permission from school as in some areas she is advanced in comparison for age and her private teacher will be able to use time more effectively. 

We also felt 11 was too young to board and keeping options open and getting back to just enjoying dance and lots of experiences/opportunities was the best way after leaving a difficult dance school last year. 

I think as parents we have to trust our instincts. 

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sounds to me that you are making very sensible choices. You clearly have a dd that is talented both in dance (YDA offer) and academically (Grammar school place). Unless your dd was absolutely desperate to go into vocational training at 11, which does not sound to be the case, holding 'both doors open' is a good strategy. There are many more dance training choices available at 16 years +. and not going into full time training until 16 is more common than you might think. There is also the possibility that by age 16 she will want to do something entirely different with her life, in which case she will be very well placed to follow other paths. And don't discount the importance of family time - once its gone you can never get it back. Good Luck!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi, my daughter is in exactly the same position as yours.  She just didn’t want to leave home at 11. She has friends that are at Elmhurst and RBS but her heart wasn’t in it. We are doing the training we can locally and will reassess later. Her school have authorised her to have one afternoon off a week in order for us to travel to have a private lesson with a fabulous teacher. They have been very supportive as we live quite remotely and to get quality teaching I have to travel. But meanwhile she is getting a broad education and time at home which was right for her at the moment. Although as with most nearly teens what she wants changes on a daily basis!! 

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree absolutely with Mnemo's post above.

As long as she is getting really good training where you live she can choose vocational school down the line at 16 if appropriate at the time....who knows what will happen in the next five years!! 

Vocational school is more important for some students at age 11 .....because they just cannot get the amount of classes they need to keep up where they live ....but if you are in this lucky position and as Mnemo said your DD is not desperate to go away from home just yet then I wouldn't worry too much. 

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

We haven’t gone down a vocational route and won’t until my DD is a bit older. My DD will be doing 10 hours a week from September with an amazing teacher who has brought her on hugely in the last few months. I can’t stand the thought of her going away and I know that at the moment it is not right for us as a family, although this has been the right path for some of her friends.  My DD is year 7 currently and her school (grammar) are really supportive of her goals and aspirations. From September she will finish early 2 days a week to ensure that we can get to her lessons.

We also know children at vocational schools from age 11 and some who have not gone until 16. Follow your instinct. 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dancer123 I think if your dd has access to 10 hours of ballet a week - good quality - then she'll do very well. There are all sorts of pitfalls at vocational school and why take the risk if you have that training at home? There is a high turnover rate at vocational school and people leave and join all the time if you change your mind in the future.

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I strongly suggest that you stay put with the fabulous local teacher and save your pennies for the later years and beyond. Pointe shoes alone will cost a small fortune when your DD is older.  I had a student join RBS in year ten who then subsequently went to Upper School and I know of many others,some who are now in major companies such as BRB and RB.

 

Now for us personally it was best thing for DS to go away at 11 as he had no other secondary school to go to! But you sound as if you have got a great academic school lined up plus the training. Teachers who are not teaching in full time vocational schools are often just as good,if not better. 

 

Your daughter is very young still and wise to keep her options open and save money into the bargain!

 

But perhaps more important is what is right for you as a family.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just want to say how delighted I am at the lovely responses to this post. I've always wondered how important vocational school at 11 is, and the responses very much follow how I feel – that the talented dancer who is busting to have that whole immersive experience should go, and the family-oriented talented dancer can happily stay at home as long as they can access enough quality training. Hurrah for such supportive and encouraging parents out there!

  • Like 8
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Some great replies to Dancer123's post. I think if your dd doesn't feel ready for vocational school and you have a super local teacher (I think I know who will be doing the 10 hours a week, and if I'm right, you'll be in safe hands!) she'll be better off being where she wants to be for now. My dd only started taking dancing seriously in year 7 and was then at a local grammar school. Because she had a bit of a journey and her ballet hours gradually increased, she moved to our local comp' in year 8 and they have been absolutely brilliant at supporting her dancing, letting her off nearly a whole day a week and leaving early two other days. She has just been accepted into vocational school for year 10 and has decided it's the right time to go. Her work-load at school has increased considerably in year 9, so is struggling with all the travel to and from dance and the homework on top. One other thing she has always found hard, especially over the last year, was having little or no time to see friends outside school, as weekends are so full-on. I'm hoping this will be better next year!

We're slightly anxious about leaving her fabulous teachers, but as someone said to her recently, she needs to find her own way now and see how she copes in a vocational school environment! It's so hard to know what the right and best path is, (especially in such a precarious world as dance) but trust your instincts and time will tell. Good luck! 

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thank you for all the lovely replies! Feel so much better about it all. Going to give it our all at local dance school and see how it goes. Think then she can make the decision when she is a bit older when the right time to go will be and hopefully we can save up

some more pennies!!!! Thanks for all taking the time to reply. She

loves her ballet so much and just want her to keep her joy of dance and be the best she can be but also have a childhood x

  • Like 7
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...