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No! What "Oh heck!" Moments Can We Share?


Fiz

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Last night I managed to to tip my 3 week old Android phone phone into the water softener! (Third world problems!). It is on contract for the next 2 years! What "Oh heck!" have other Ballet Co-ers that they wish to share?

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I said rather more than "oh heck" when - having forked out ridiculous amounts to keep the car going - our dishwasher died, and then yesterday the tumble dryer died too. In between my Mum phoning for the umpteenth time. :-/

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I have an old London Black cab. We use it to ferry our 3 bulldogs in!!!!! But its due an MOT. I knew it needed a new exhaust. Fine. But then they rang and said it needed something else. I have to order the parts which I did but didn't get the price. They have me over a barrel as there are limited places to buy. I nipped out and when I got back my daughter said the parts place had rung with the cost. That lot and the exhaust cost half as much as the taxi. That was a more than "Oh No!" moment. Even the dogs were shocked!!!!

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I used to have an expensive watch and every day when I got in I would take it off and put it on the spice rack. One day I got up and the watch wasn't there and I had no idea what had happened to it or where I had put it. I searched the house from top to bottom with no success. One day my mum was babysitting and rung me at work to say she had found the watch, I was so thrilled until she told me where it was...... smashed and flattened into the tarmac outside my house!!!! It must have fallen off my wrist without me realising and gone under the car, I had been driving over and over it for weeks!!! :-(

Oh heck,heck,heck :-D

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One very early morning I decided to scrub the kitchen floor (this was many years ago!). So, I poured some soapy water on the floor and scrubbed and then went out to the garage to get a mop to sop it all up. I knew right where the mop was so no need to turn on the light. Hmm...no mop. Put the light on - maybe it fell over. No mop. Really? Of all the things to steal in the garage the mop would be the least valuable. I decided to go back in the house and start over.

 

Walked out again to the garage, put the light on - looked around thoroughly - no mop. A pair of expensive clippers were there as well as all my husband's tools - but no mop. Nothing else missing. This left me with no option but to find lots of raggy absorbent cloths to remove the soapy water from the kitchen floor. What should have taken a few minutes took well over an hour - including lots of time on my knees.

 

Took the soppy cloths out to the garage and while there - might as well put in a load of clothes into the washer. Good - got that going.

 

OK - brreakfast. Got all the breakfast stuff together and put iit on the breakfast counter. Sat down - turned on the TV to listen to the morning news (and see if the rest of the world was having a better morning than I was). Took my first bite of toast, heard about five minutes of news. Then I heard a whine - like a mechanical something not right - then it got louder and louder.....oh dear - coming from the garage! Ran out - smoke coming from the washer. Yanked the plug out of the socket. Seems like a bit of the clothes got caught on the agitator thingie in the washer and the motor had burned out. So, no clean clothes.

 

Back to breakfast and the TV news. Took a couple of more bites of toast - there was a very loud pop and a flash from the TV - and then nothing! Blank! It was a brand new Sony. I called the dealer and he said that the possibility of a complete blowup of a new Sony was one in 100,000 ! Bring it over and he'll order a new picture tube - it will take four weeks to arrive. Since this was such a rare occurrence they didn't stock picture tubes.

 

By this time - I knew I needed help. Called my husband at work and told him about my lovely morning (my theory is that if I'm unhappy - he should be too). He listened patiently to the tales of woe about the washer and the TV. Then I said - "I can't even find the mop and had to sop up off the soapy water on my knees!"

 

"Oh" he said, "don't worry about the mop - I took it to work." He ran a research and development lab for the federal gov't and he had put in a request for the floor to be mopped because dust was getting into sensitive electronic equipment. The procedure of paperwork would take weeks to wend its way through the bureaucratic maze - so he simply took MY MOP to do the job.

 

So, now in addition to everything else, I am angry that as a taxpayer I am paying this highly skilled person (my husband) to mop a floor in a gov't lab because of gov't paper work.

 

And I am now missing a mop to boot.

 

When I sat back down at the dining table to finally finish my breakfast - I saw in front of me an empty table. HUH? What happened to my food? the plate? Glass of juice? the rest of the toast? I couldn't believe it!!

 

Well, turns out - I had put my breakfast on the breakast counter - and I was now sitting in the dining room. The food was still waiting for me on the breakfast counter.......the toast long since cold and soggy.

 

Now if I wrote that scene as fiction - no one would believe it.

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We have something like a poltergeist and I think it could be a child. So far this week, my dog's favourite toy disappeared before it landed on the ground when I threw it for her, an earring back vanished and disappeared an hour later and a turquoise necklace did the same over a longer period, plus a pearl and Murano glass heart pendant and my heart shaped amber pendant (the last two have re-appeared where they were last seen and where I had already looked). One blue spinel earring has vanished and one tear drop pearl one! I know it sounds crazy but I am very careful with my jewellery. the dog is upset about her beloved toy and to add to the general fun of Fiz Towers, our car needs and new water pump and we cannot go up to Lincoln and collect our ex DD. We have not seen her for 5 months :(

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We pay the RAC a freaking fortune for Roadside Recovery and last night, after my husband had taken our eldest to the station, our car, which had just passed its MOT, broke down at about 8.30. We live nine miles away. My poor husband eventually got in at 1.00!!! Not good enough, RAC!

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Lots of "oh heck" moments in this thread now!

 

Anjuli, I remember several days like the one you described. Sometimes I think it would be easier to retreat to bed, pull the covers over my head, and start afresh the next day. :-)

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I had a real heartsink moment last week. I went to have a peek at my late mum's wedding ring which is one of very few things I have that belonged to her, only to discover that it's disappeared. :( Now it was in a separate small box within my jewellry box, so it's unlikely to have dropped out by accident, and it's highly improbable that someone broke in, left no evidence of forced entry and took only that ring. So I reckon that the culprit is either my teenage daughter or one of my 2 small boys, all of whom have been shouted at previously for messing with my jewellry. However, they are all denying it and despite tearing my room apart I can't find it. I am furious, but even more upset than cross. However, it must still be in the house somewhere so I live in hope that one day it will reappear.

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Pups Mum - I surely hope that special ring turns up. Did you ever put it on?

 

I have a jewelry box/furniture piece (floor to waist high) with many individual compartmentalized segments in each drawer. I put the jewelry pieces back carefully in specific compartments. And yet - the next time I open the drawer everything seems to have somehow gotten into a tangle.

 

There are no children - or anyone else - besides me and my husband in this house. So, I can only conclude that when I close the drawer and turn off the light - there's a lot of hanky-panky goin' on in those jewelry drawers.

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Not an oh heck moment but interesting in the light of "things" going missing.

 

Whilst staying overnight in a hotel, I spent a considerable amount of time looking for a particular eye-liner which I had specifcally taken with me. Couldn't find it anywhere, checked under all the furniture etc - gave up .

 

Upon returning home went to return the make-up I had taken away back in to my Caboodles box (can somebody tell me where I can buy a new one of these) and, low and behold, there winking at me smugly was the particular eye-liner which I had taken away with me. There must be a new breed of gremlins who can fly and be back before me in time to put it away.

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One of my sandals slipped off my foot as I was getting on a train and went down the gap between train and platform and onto the track. I got off at the next station and hopped over to the ticket office. They helpfully phoned the other station for me and asked them to retrieve it and put it on the next train.

 

Waited an hour for the next train - no sandal. Phoned again, and they said they'd got the sandal, but hadn't put it on the train as they didn't have a lost property bag to put it in. Pointed out that it wasn't lost but found. Made no difference, so I had to wait another hour to get the train back to where I started.

 

On the journey - you've guessed it - I passed my sandal taking a ride on a train going the other way. AAARghhh!!!

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My sister was taking basketball equipment to a very important match and completely and legally ignored her phone constantly buzzing whilst driving. She arrived at the match complete with equipment but no son to wear it.... she'd left him behind on the doorstep. Funny thing was she'd wondered why the car was so quiet!

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  • 4 weeks later...

The Miami City Ballet routinely performs in Miami, Fort Lauderdale and West Palm Beach, Florida. Two years ago I flew from Chicago to Fort Lauderdale to see Romeo & Juliet. When I got to the theater I noticed signs for the musical “Wicked.” I asked a theater attendant, “Is the Miami City Ballet performing Romeo & Juliet today?” “Yes,” the attendant said politely, “in West Palm Beach!redface-4.gif

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  • 2 weeks later...

Late other evening, dd announced she needed a new pair of pointe shoes for the following morning (EYB). Fortunately I have some new pairs for just such an occasion.

 

However, I completely forgot all about it until gone midnight, just as I was off to bed. Grrr...!

 

Got them out, sewed on the ribbons (with difficulty as I couldn't find my reading glasses). At one o'clock, bleary-eyed I was about to put them in her bag ready for the morning, when I remembered that she likes me to soften the shanks a little.

 

Did one, as I usually do, did the second....SNAP!

 

Oh **** (insert your preferred four-letter word here)!

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A phone rings: Ring -a-ling……

 

Hello - First Avenue Florist Shop - can I help you?

 

Hello, I’m here in San Diego but I would like to order a really nice flower arrangement for a Bat Mitzvah(religious confirmation) in a synagogue in Philadelphia - can you do that for me?

 

Yes, - we are members of the FTD - we have outlets across the country.

 

I don’t know the exact address of the synagogue but it’s a big one on Roosevelt Blvd. Do I need to get you the exact address?

 

No, our florist in Philly will know - they’ll check out the synagogue as long as you give me the family’s name.

 

Oh good. Okay.

 

What would you like?

 

I’d like something very fresh and colorful - it’s for a girl - a Bat Mitzvah is kinda like a confirmation…

 

Yes, I know what it is - we do flowers for these events all the time. Well, since it’s April - how about an arrangement of spring flowers?

 

Sounds good.

 

Or would you like flowers in pots - that way they can take them home afterward and have something more permanent? Like a pot of daffodils?

 

No - I think a big spray arrangement of cut flowers is better.

 

Okay.

 

I’d like it delivered on Friday afternoon - tomorrow - so it’s there for Friday evening Sabbath services and then it’ll still be there for the Bat Mitzvah on Saturday.

 

Okay….sure….

 

It’s not too late - since it is for tomorrow?

 

No, problem….we’ve just changed over to daylight savings time…so we make adjustments for that.

 

What do you have for around $100.00?

 

I can give you something really nice for that price - plus, of course the cross country fee - and a fee for delivery. It comes to $150.00.

 

Okay - here’s the info for my credit card….you do take credit card don’t you?

 

Okay - I got it - all the information I need…..anything else?

 

No - that should do it - thanks a lot.

 

Thank you!

 

(About two hours later)

 

Ring-a-ling…

 

Hello. How can I help you?

 

Hello - I was speaking to you earlier - I placed an order for a Bat Mitzvah.

 

Oh - yes, I remember.

 

Well, some things I forgot to mention - or make sure I made clear.

 

Okay.

 

Did you get the order going already - did the delivery people get the address of the synagogue?

 

Yes, - they have all they need.

 

I want to make sure that it will still be fresh from one day to the next the synagogue doesn’t accept deliveries on Saturdays. I assume the synagogue has a large enough refrigerator to keep it fresh overnight.

 

Yes, of course - to keep everything looking good and fresh - it has to be refrigerated - but the synagogue will do that - they know to do that. All these places …..churches, synagogues, have large enough refrigerators.

 

Okay. There is a time difference - and since I said Friday afternoon - the delivery needs to take into account the time difference.

 

Yes, we realize that - we’ve changed our clocks for daylight savings time.

 

I also want to be sure it won’t be in pots - I want it to look like a spray or a circle. That it will be fresh cut.

 

It will be fresh cut - only the best looking. We don’t do things in pots very much. It’ll be an attractive arrangement.

 

I want it to be bright and colorful.

 

Yes, we’ll see to it that everything has a good bright color - arranged in contrasting colors. There will be colorful mats underneath.

 

Well, that’s a good idea, keeps it all neat if something should spill over.

 

Some greenery too….

 

Oh yes, we put greenery not only around the edges, but in the center - we mix it in. Sprigs of cinnamon fern, some mint, ….things like that. We cut things in different sizes and shapes to make it all look interesting and beautiful at the same time.

 

I’ve never heard of using mint in such arrangements - but that sounds like a good idea.

 

Yes, we make it so that everything is edible.

 

Edible?

 

Well, that’s the basic idea…..

 

Edible flowers?

 

Flowers?

 

Is this is the florist?

 

Uh..…this is Sid’s deli……..

 

 

(The above is a true story - happened to me - I couldn’t make this up.) (Sid and I spent a long time laughing.)

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My sister was taking basketball equipment to a very important match and completely and legally ignored her phone constantly buzzing whilst driving. She arrived at the match complete with equipment but no son to wear it.... she'd left him behind on the doorstep. Funny thing was she'd wondered why the car was so quiet!

Those 'Home Alone' movies don't seem quite so far fetched now.
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My "Oh ****" moment came when I opened the post and found a lovely penalty notice from TFL. Apparently I inadvertently strayed into a box junction when caught in the father and mother of all traffic jams ten days ago. With so many motorists trying to avoid the Olympic lanes it was total gridlock here in the East End. TFL must have made a fortune in fines - maddeningly I read that no-one was fined for accidentally going in the Zil lanes - I should have stuck to my original route!

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  • 2 weeks later...

My 'Oh ****!!' moment came on my birthday, in Bloch in Covent Garden. The extremely enthusiastic assistant asked to see what shoes I currently wore (and then rather insulted them by saying 'How on Earth do you dance in these?! I'd cry myself to sleep if i had to wear these!!') and asked 'Are they a bit small?' I said 'yes, a little bit,'- thinking that pointes are supposed to be snug, but id be able to wear them for a month or so longer. She replied, without checking, 'Can I just do *This*, and stood on them and bent them, which created a hideous snapping sound. Those shoes still fitted- I only wanted to buy a spare pair, not have my old ones made in to soft blocks!! (they were a custom-made Christmas present, and thus very special!!) We spent nearly an hour in Bloch, but just couldnt seem to find a perfect shoe. Most annoyingly, we had just 2 hours before we had to catch a train home!! Luckily, I got an utterly beautiful pair of Mindens from Dancia, but was still deeply irked at the 'death' of my old shoes!!!! ;)

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A rather sheepish hubby came back from filling my car with petrol yesterday. He said he hoped I wouldn't be cross, but he'd pranged it at the petrol station, and dented it, scratched lumps out of the bumper, and scored great lines along the light fitting.

 

DD and I roared with laughter - the reason?

 

He's a qualified driving instructor!

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