"I wish so much that I could have talked to people like us, at the beginning of this journey and been open minded enough to believe how absolutely gruelling vocational training is and how damaging it can be to young minds and family relationships.
I wouldn’t have listened"
Right now I am really envying the parents whose dc have already made the tough decision to call time on dance. My dya (dance young adult) is just completing first year of vocational training and I have to say that I am more worried about the future than ever before. The experience of the school to date (don't wish to identify it but has been widely discussed in other posts) has been exceptionally disappointing. Timetabling is done at very short notice (it changes each week) such that students often don't know until the last minute that they have free time, by which time it is too late to make plans. Lessons have been cancelled due to issues with e.g. utilities which surely could have been foreseen and avoided. On the other hand, lessons have gone ahead in an unlit studio with no music (piantist? nah) due to a powercut, a situation that would not be tolerated in a non vocational dance school. On my last visit I was appalled at the dirtiness of the accommodation which is also extremely cramped (1 bathroom for 5 students and a kitchenette). In the time yda has been there, a 14-year love of ballet has been almost extinguished and there have been too many distressing phone calls about assessment results delivered bluntly and brutally. Any suggestions that I might contact the school are met with horror, and I suspect out of fear of retribution. It seems to me that the school is run entirely for the benefit of a favoured few with focus of resource and energy on what I would term vanity projects. Yet all are paying the same fees. I have several times assured yda that just walking away is an option that we would support, but they are adamant that they want to continue with the training to the end of the course. Given that only a very few of the students graduate into work, I am struggling to see what benefit this will deliver, but on the other hand I do understand that my young adult has to make the final choice. I suspect that my anxiety is being further heightened because yda's sibling is departing to an extremely prestigious university next academic year and the contrast could not be more marked. My yda, although reasonably able, has always hated anything academic and yes I also worry about the consequences of jumping out of the frying pan into an empty grate. If there is anyone out there who has ever felt as helpless and hopeless as this, what would you advise? Am I being an hysterical parent - or should I listen to my instincts?