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People who just don't understand!


taxi4ballet

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Wow Balletbean as a teacher I am shocked and angry, teachers like this head give us a bad name! Goodness me why are they so very inflexible? My DD went to a vocational school abroad and did NO GCSEs! Every school she applied to in the UK for entry at 16 it was not a problem! She had excellent reports and grades from the school and that was all that was required even to embark on A'levels if she wanted to. Why oh why is it so important to have 15 or 16 GCSEs? If your speak to somebody from Finland (supposedly one of the best education systems in the World with the best overall achievement grades for students) you will find students who didn't begin formal education until they were 7, did NO homework (inFinland students are expected to use their time after school for sport, arts etc NOT school work) and did not sit final school exams until 19 years old! This obsession with " the more the better" is crazy, when did it become de rigour to be so busy that you have no time to reflect and think about the world about you? No wonder kids only have the energy to slump on the sofa in the evenings, they must be mentally exhausted with trying to push so much into their brains. Gosh it's crazy, I am now living and working in Asia and there is something to be said for the ability of the people here to simply sit and take in the world around them. I would definitely speak to somebody on the board of governors, this head has acted very unprofessionally and just plain rude, wow telling you to go to another school if you don't like it wow, I am speechless!

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I'm still feeling rather shell shocked. Written off the day completely. It will be a long weekend before I speak to anyone else.

 

Thank you once again to everyone. It's been quite heart warming the support on offer here

 

I will give my DD extra hugs tonight. Together we will get through this. Hiccup.

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DD just did no coursework or homework for one of her option blocks - we explained honestly to the teacher (who was really annoyed but as we said we never 'wanted' to do the course/exam) & she just coasted through & actually got a C (no idea how)

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However awful the e-mail, I would agree with others that the best course of action would be to rise above it for the moment, but store it for further use.

 

I think in your position I would be trying to flush out the reasons for this decision. The best way to do this might actually be to tell them all the possible reasons that they could have - and explain a way of solving each or why it isn't valid. That might short circuit a whole series of communications in which you trade issues and possible solutions,.

 

So:

'I can understand that you may be concerned that you do not have supervision for X while her peers are doing this option. However [insert solution that you and DD come up with - library, doing work at back of class]..

 

Another reason that you might want to refuse this request is X's grades and their potential positive impact on your statistics. [Explain Progress 8 measure, and why her remaining subjects will give her the maximum points in this anyway - in fact it would be better to get REALLY high marks in these key 8 rather than jeopardise them by spreading effort too thinly.]

 

I appreciate that you may wish not to set a precedent for other students. However, you will have a limited number of students who devote Y hours to an extra-curricular area which they intend to make their career, so the precedent set is very limited and easy to explain.'

 

etc etc. You are basically challenging them to either state that their reason is none of the above (do try to include all the reasonable-sounding options, so any other they come up with has to sound absolutely daft) or that your solutions don't work.

 

It also makes you sound TERRIBLY reasonable, which will stand you in good stead as you refer this higher. Definitely governors once you have worked out WHY they have refused.

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Gosh,

 

I wish I could take you all to the meetings with me next week.

 

Instead I will make do with your kind words of advice and support sitting on my right shoulder. Just like an imaginary friend whispering in my ear. 

 

Thank you sounds such a simple word but it truly means so much to me. 

 

Have a good weekend everyone.  :wub:

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Once again, I stand amazed at the level of support people in the Doing Dance forum provide for each other.  Hats off to all of you!

 

That said, I can't help thinking this whole sorry story needs a thread of its own now, unfortunately :(

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Permission????

Surely you don't heed permisdion for 6th form or college interviews/auditions whether it be performing or academic.

You just inform them of dates & go.

I think it only polite to ask if a student may be excused, even if you intend to go regardless.

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At our local school, if permission is not given for absence (for whatever reason) the absence is then marked down as 'an unauthorised absence.' This shows up on School Reports, but I do not know what may happen if you get several of them in a short period of time. Even failing to notify the school of your child's absence by 8.15 am will incur an unauthorised absence note on their file.

 

For some of us living overseas, even a short audition can mean 2 nights accommodation along with expensive flights too. We often found that we were unable to fly over and get back in one day. Also, bearing in mind how difficult it can be just to secure an audition, flying over the evening or afternoon before (if there's a flight!) is a really good idea. This can mean additional time off school.

 

We really found it useful to have the school's co-operation and support during this time. They even authorised time off during mock IGCSE weeks too. Luckily for us (I now realise!) the school is happy for students to take 10 IGCSEs and entrance to excellent universities can be obtained with this number, providing the grades are very high of course.

 

I would add that our DD cut out any dance activities that we thought were not entirely necessary to enable her to give sufficient time to her studies. This meant not being in some groups at festivals that she would normally be in. We tried to look at the 'bigger picture' and decided that excellent IGCSE results would be very important at some time in the future and as much ballet training as we could find too. Basically everything else could wait! It's hard seeing her friends doing song and dance groups, tap routines, etc that she's not involved in, but none of them auditioned this year for full-time dance courses and very few will in the future.

 

I do wish everyone the best in dealings with their schools.

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At our local school, if permission is not given for absence (for whatever reason) the absence is then marked down as 'an unauthorised absence.' This shows up on School Reports, but I do not know what may happen if you get several of them in a short period of time. Even failing to notify the school of your child's absence by 8.15 am will incur an unauthorised absence note on their file.

 

For some of us living overseas, even a short audition can mean 2 nights accommodation along with expensive flights too. We often found that we were unable to fly over and get back in one day. Also, bearing in mind how difficult it can be just to secure an audition, flying over the evening or afternoon before (if there's a flight!) is a really good idea. This can mean additional time off school.

 

 

Oh, yes.  The 3 day break off school for the one audition.  Or in the case of my eldest, we ended up having a 10 continuous days (incl weekend) for 3 interviews travelling around England, that involved 2 flights and goodness knows how many trains and changes, hotels. Physically and mentally exhausted and draining on the wallet and that was just me!.

 

Overseas, has it's bonus points but does have it's draw backs.  I appreciate that they do accept videos but the audition experience with others present is immeasurable, also gave me time as a parent to check out the area. All the info you can't get from a prospectus.  

Edited by balletbean
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I'm not sure if the Gifted and Talented Programme runs everywhere but, if it is available in your area, possibly worth investigating? We found that having DD's name on the list meant that most teachers were aware of where her interests lie. Obviously it doesn't show the amount of hours you dedicate to dance, but it may help when 'negotiating' time off. I know that several girls on this at DD's school were involved in athletics at a fairly high level. If they were on the 'Gold Level', I believe they would be more likely to gain time off for competing/workshops if required. It's also something extra to write down as an achievement, particularly if you're on the Gold Level.

 

If your DD is already on this programme, then I don't think I have any more ideas!

Edited by Hull
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With regard to authorised absence, attendance at an interview (so for dance read audition) should be authorised with the code J - page 19 of this document might be useful to refer to in any dealings:

 

https://www.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/518586/Advice_on_school_attendance.pdf

 

Incidentally, codes P and F might help those who struggle to get time off for summe schools - the get out clause is 'someone/an organisation approved by the school' but I think it would be difficult to not approve the Royal Ballet Schhol for example!

 

But to defend schools, attendance is a VERY significant factor in inspection judgements especially in the current policitcal climate, with a focus on safeguarding children and 'children missing education' being something that could send even the very best of schools (however that's is judged) into a requires improvement or special measures category.

 

But to reiterate, yes you are most definitely entitled to an authorised absence to attend interviews/auditions at other educational establishments and I am sure the school would rather give you an authorised absence for those occasions than an unauthorised one! Good luck!

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I guess because DS goes to an independent school & dd went to an independent junior school it is very common for year 6 & year 11 children to have time off to attend academic entrance exams/sports/music scholarship exams in the same way as 6th formers attend uni interviews.

 

Indeed ds's school closes for an entire day to hold their own entrance exams.

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For a summer school at somewhere like RBS they can use the authorised absence code for 'educated offsite' as well - I've also known them use 'approved sporting activity'.

 

What you must never do is ask for 'holiday'!!

Edited by taxi4ballet
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Permission????

 

Surely you don't heed permisdion for 6th form or college interviews/auditions whether it be performing or academic.

 

You just inform them of dates & go.

Sorry to tell you this, Pictures, but even your own DD's school has been known to be awkward about the number of external auditions the year 11's go to.

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Though to be honest they can be as awkward as they like. I'll be taking her out for whatever open evenings/assessments we see fit.

 

The open day at one of her possible 6th form choices always clashes with her current school. They do have a 6th form open evening but it starts at 6pm so she'd have to leave school early for that even b

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Yes - why have RBS suddenly started choosing earlier dates for the summer schools?  I want a couple of students to apply for it, but as it clashes with our school performance, it's really difficult - I want to push them, but it's sad that if they're accepted (miracle of miracles) it will be at the expense of our school performance :(

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Just to add to the mix .. I found our local council had a "parent partnership" team which worked alongside the admissions team. They have been very good at mediating issues for us.

 

DD's school has just had its ofsted results and yet again was inadequate. Safeguarding was a big issue.

 

I'm afraid that when it comes to emails I have run out of political correctness and courtesy now and find that a bit of frankness in terms of what the issues are and what you want to get out of a situation go a long way!

 

It's worth talking to the local council attendance person too before attendance is referred as an issue by the school. In our case DD's attendance was recorded incorrectly when it should have been 97% so I kept my own records and have asked for every mistake to be corrected.

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It's worth talking to the local council attendance person too before attendance is referred as an issue by the school. In our case DD's attendance was recorded incorrectly when it should have been 97% so I kept my own records and have asked for every mistake to be corrected.

Hi, Unfortunately I am outside the UK and don't have a local council or Ofsted.  The school in question is also Private (Public in UK terms) so they are run separate from any education authority as far as enforcing rules and regulations, especially the ones that appear to be made up as they go along.  :(

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For a summer school at somewhere like RBS they can use the authorised absence code for 'educated offsite' as well - I've also known them use 'approved sporting activity'.

 

What you must never do is ask for 'holiday'!!

After the last 48hrs, I have given up on the ASKING I am now in the mode of INFORMING the school when time off is required. Politely obviously.They brought it upon themselves.  :P

Edited by balletbean
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Regarding time off school. I had a nightmare and battle with dd school (Pictures you are very familiar with this incident) 2 years ago shortly after she started high school. She had performed the previous Xmas when in year 6 in the children's cast of a local theatres professional Xmas production. Getting the 20 sessions/half days off for schools performances for the 10 week run was no problem with her headmistress and she said that dd would need to work really hard to keep up with SATS coming up. Well the following Xmas/two years ago when she got to high school and was successful again, I hit a brick wall with dd headmaster. He would not authorise the 20 sessions but only 10. He really put his foot down and would not budge despite me contacting local education authority, downloading regulations for 'performers' and explained that as a performing child they are covered by the performance licence. Well for 6 weeks I battled and finally he backed down due to her excellent start/progress and achievement in that short time. He has however never once congratulated her, mentioned her in the school newsnotes (though they mention anything and every sporting achievement ????) He has however allowed her to perform again last Xmas and again this as she has proved herself and kept up with school work so I guess we should be greatful but I just feel that he doesn't 'get' performing arts and has never really 'got it'.

Also her guitar teacher doesn't 'get it' either. She has scheduled her exam in for early Dec (told her it was bad timing due to her performing with the theatre). She doesn't understand that she won't be able to take anymore authorised time out of school. ????

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Returning to the original post I would check the school's prospectus. What does it state about choosing options? It would be useful to quote their own literature against them. If geography is an option they cannot make it compulsory. These days schools should be flexible about a pupil's education. Some children will access college courses as an option. At dcs school they can choose Pe or do a Btec first in Fe, as an example.

Good luck with it. If the school is LEA maintained you can speak to education dept at council. If it is a church school then discuss with the school gouvenors. They cannot make you move schools although you may wish to.

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Thank you Mummy Twinkle Toes, 

 

Just awaiting a call to attend yet another meeting to 'discuss' the current situation. Calmed down just a tad since Friday's email but it won't take me much to get me going....... and it's only Monday! I never really understand any schools need to be so obstructive. They appear to have overlooked the individual child just hide behind policy, rules, laws, health and safety..........blah blah blah. So tired of it all. 

 

I attended the school for 13 years and my DD's have attended the exact same school knocking on 17 continuous years. You would think by know I would understand how they operate. Oh, how wrong could I be. 

 

Thanks again for the support and advice, everyone has been great. 

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To all the wonderful people on this forum,

 

I am happy to announce that after more meetings and extended phone calls in the last 24hrs an agreement has been met.

 

School have finally agreed for option subject to be dropped

 

All is right with the world.... for now. So happy.

 

Thank you once again :wub:     

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To all the wonderful people on this forum,

 

I am happy to announce that after more meetings and extended phone calls in the last 24hrs an agreement has been met.

 

School have finally agreed for option subject to be dropped

 

All is right with the world.... for now. So happy.

 

Thank you once again :wub:

 

Great news balletbean. I'm really pleased for your dd.

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