petty or reasonable?

[balletmummy]

Hi fellow balletcoers!

 

Dd has recently left her ballet school where she had been since the age of 3 (she is now 10). She took a ballet exam in June but since we have now left she will not be given her certificate/medal in class.

 

Dds teacher who runs the school firstly asked us to collect it from her which I wont be able to do easily because of other commitments. I asked her to post it to us, which she said was unreliable due to Royal Mail. Now she is asking us to send her a stamp to the value of 96p(!) and then she will post it to us.

 

My question is-can't she just send it to us herself? After teaching dd for 7 and a half years, dd getting in to one of the big 4 Associate programme s at the age of 8, me helping out at countless shows... couldn't she just send dd's certificate and medal herself? Am I being unreasonable in expecting this? 

 

In my work I have posted things to clients out of goodwill and have never asked them to reimburse me for the postage!

 

What are your thoughts?

 

 

[alison]

She's running a business, isn't she?  Fancy making a fuss about 96 p.  It's a legitimate business expense, apart from anything else.

[annaliesey]

Can't someone you know pick it up for you?

 

Otherwise I would send the 96p just to be done with it

 

You never know, maybe she loses a lot of students and the cost adds up ... (meow!) haha

[hfbrew]

It's petty. I've sent certificates at my own expense. Having said that it is a nuisance having to find a secure enough envelope because certificates are easily damaged in the post. But send the 96p with a very sweet thank you, it might make her reflect a bit.

And you could send the 96p by cheque!!

Edited August 24, 2016 by hfbrew

[joyofdance]

She is being extremely petty. This sounds like her way of exerting some sort of control and being spiteful because you have left the dance school. I have seen this sort of behaviour before even when children have left a school on "good" terms. My DD's old dance school would behave exactly like this. Send her a stamped addressed envelope and ignore the pettyness, it isnt worth your energy.

[Pups_mum]

It is petty, and I am surprised you have even had to ask for it to be posted to be honest.I can understand that this must feel very hurtful when you have done a lot for the school in the past. But it sounds like you won't be dealing with this teacher again so I would just pay it, get the certificate and forget about her.

[Jacqueline]

I agree, it is petty to demand pennies for a stamp, unless she is having to send out 100s of certificates. It should be a matter of good will to just send you the item but some people just can't or won't see it that way, regardless of the time you have given helping at shows and the years your daughter attended the school. I would be tempted to send her a stamped, addressed, padded envelope along with a pithy note but she probably won't 'get' it. I like the idea of sending a cheque!

However, if there is really no way you can collect the certificate yourself, or as has also been suggested, ask someone to get it for you, just grit your teeth, send her what she needs and have done with it. Life's too short. 

[Lisa O`Brien]

I also think it is petty of her. Jeez, I even sometimes allow people off paying me the odd pound on things they have bought off me off Ebay if the postage they have paid is insufficient. If she wants her precious 96p then by all means send it to her. But yes, she comes across as being very petty. Perhaps she is being like this because you have left the school?

[orchidblue]

Very petty but I'd send a cheque for 96p, just to annoy her. It's probably cheaper than you making an inconvenient journey to collect it yourself and at least no face to face contact is required that way. Yes, it's a business but I'm sure she's more than made a living out of your previous business. Be the bigger person and pay it & be done. ☺

[alison]

Having said that it is a nuisance having to find a secure enough envelope because certificates are easily damaged in the post.

 

This is true.  Although a cut-down cereal packet makes a good stiffener for A4 envelopes.

 

Oh, and there is one other thing: in my extensive experience, there aren't that many wide-apertured pillar boxes which will take stiffened A4.  She might have to go some distance before she finds one

[Yaffa]

My gut feeling would also be that the teacher's being petty but not worth wasting precious time and energy over 96 p. However, an outside chance - I've actually seen several cases where a teacher has always sent out everything (forgotten ballet shoes etc.) at her own expense. Then she meets with her accountant to go over her figures, and he asks why she has such a large postage bill. She explains and the accountant says she really must say to everyone who requests mail that they send her the postage. So she does that when the next request for sending something comes up, without really thinking about the circumstances or the amount...

[Hull]

I am responsible for posting items for our small business and it is often more complicated than it would appear to be. Not only do we have to source unusual envelopes/packaging, but we do not always have the correct postage available. It often means a trip to the local Post Office (and a long wait in the queue) - sometimes I just look up the address and if it is fairly near, I drop it into the house instead. Also, we have had a few instances when items have become lost in the post, necessitating us replacing the item at our cost. It all adds up to lots of receipts and extra work doing our accounts.

 

Maybe your dance teacher thought that as you previously visited the studios fairly frequently (I presume), you would be able to drop in to collect it.

[alison]

True, Hull - and I do sympathise: I'm having to consider increasing my charges for certification simply because a trip to the PO will unfortunately soon take me a lot longer than the 10 minutes it currently takes, not to mention the queuing time.  Not helped by the PO/Royal Mail not producing stamps you can take away and use at a later date, either, but I digress ...  OTOH, the teacher is only asking for the postage costs, so would still have to go down to a PO somewhere and queue, or locate a big pillar box.

 

Yaffa, I'd agree that returning forgotten items of dancewear is beyond the call of duty, but I would regard the sending of certificates, where necessary, as part and parcel of running a business - to the extent of at least keeping a few stiffened envelopes in stock.  I'll admit to the possibility of them getting lost in the post, of course.

[OnlyDance]

My gut reaction is petty. Of course she could just send it (without asking for the 96p). Undoubtedly, her behaviour is because your dd has left the school. Sour grapes me thinks.

[Picturesinthefirelight]

I have mixed feelings on this one. I used to administrate LAMDA exams & every year there was always someone who left the school before certificates arrived. One year there were quite a bunch of students who were leaving to go to college & I realised how much it was costing, not only for the large letter stamp but the envelope & going to the post office etc.

 

So I decided from then on they had to provide an SAE if they wNted certificates posting.

[Petit Jete]

Is it just the certificate you have asked her to post balletmummy or her report too?

 

I would certainly expect any pupil of mine, regardless of whether they have left or not, to come in to collect their report in person. After so much hard work from pupil and teacher, marks need to be explained to the pupil and discussed with the parent if so wished.

 

I would happily forward on any certificate but would expect to hand over any report 'in person'.

[Pas de Quatre]

Will there be anywhere for the postman to deliver the certificate? If it is properly strengthened the envelope won't go through a normal domestic letterbox. So unless there is someone at home, the postie will just deliver a card for it to be picked up at a post office.